Archibald. Thomas.
Got any, uh...
big plans this weekend?
The weekend, you say?
Well,
let me check my phone.
Curious.
It says here that I'll be attending
the World Series of Bowling, baby.
Uh, me, too.
Hot sauce on the bun.
All right, we got two days to be ready
for the biggest moment of my life,
but I'm focused, ready to bust my *.
What're we gonna do?
Well, I have something planned,
but, uh, I'm not sure you can handle it.
Lay it on me.
I'm ready to sweat.
So...
you sweating yet?
You kidding?
It's like a sauna in here.
Sorry, Helen, what are we gonna do?
A new style or just a trim?
Oh, no, I just came for the wash.
That's free, isn't it?
- Yes. - Yeah.
For the tenth time.
I don't know, maybe I should try something new.
Ooh.
The only reason a woman
tries something new is if she's in love,
- getting divorced... - Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
- ... or she's on the run from the law. - Oh.
And you're not crying,
and I don't hear any sirens.
Are things getting serious with Archie?
How I feel about Archie
is none of your damn business.
A little defensive. You may be in love. Have you told him?
How I feel about Archie
is none of his damn business, either.
Well, I think when you love someone, you should tell them.
I agree. What are you waiting for?
Jiminy Christmas. I should've known
there's no such thing as a free wash.
Sure we shouldn't be at the alley practicing?
The only * I've seen today are when you bent over
to turn up the heat.
Hey.
Don't look at the sky if you don't want to see the sun.
Just saying, we got the biggest tournament
of my life in a couple days.
It's everything we've worked for all year.
That is exactly
why we shouldbe here.
You need to clear your mind, you know, rest, relax.
Take a minute to appreciate everything we've accomplished.
Going to the World Series.
How'd we do it, Arch?
- Heart. - Yeah.
That's part of it. Got to have heart.
Tight.
Kept my game tight, too.
Oh! Heart. Tight. Okay.
Okay, listen, breathe. I-it's probably just indigestion, okay?
Hey!
We got a heart attack!
Archie. Archie!
Don't look at me. He's having a heart attack!
- Oh, Tom. Was it a heart attack? - I don't know.
- Is he gonna be okay? - I don't know anything yet.
Okay, I'm gonna go see him.
You can't right now, Ma.
Just because you're dressed like a doctor,
you think you can boss people around?
Why are you wearing scrubs?
We were at the spa when it happened.
I was wearing a towel in the ambulance,
- it kept falling off. - Oh.
So they gave me these, which they had the whole time.
What did they say?
They said they didn't see anything,
- but... - My God. About Archie.
Nothing, nothing yet.
He's gonna be fine.
Right?
Well, of course he's gonna be fine.
You're right. He's gonna be fine.
How the hell do you know?
- So, Mr. Betts... - Oh.
... did in fact have a cardiac event.
A cardiac event? His heart didn't open for Steely Dan.
Just say heart attack.
Sorry, she's really worried,
and everybody hates Steely Dan.
It's okay.
He had a heart attack.
We're gonna perform a coronary angioplasty
and insert a stent.
That sounds serious.
Well, he's lucky you were there.
Oh, I'm not a doctor. I just...
I know. You were the crying * guy in the ambulance.
All right, all right, come on.
Let's cheer up here, okay?
Carl, can I get you something?
I'm not hungry.
Yeah, I can't eat, either.
Look, guys, we-we got to stay positive here, okay?
Archie's gonna be fine,
and I'm... I'm... I'm gonna steer this ship
until he's back, and he's gonna be back.
- Damn right. - And... and he wouldn't want us
hanging our heads or moping around, you know?
So, let's just keep our chins up for Arch.
All right, I have a confession.
This is all my fault.
Yesterday, I texted him some nudes.
Damn this body of mine.
I have a confession, too.
When you asked me for Archie's number, I just gave you mine.
You've been sending those to me.
Sam, go get some lunch.
Can I get the Heart Attack Burger?
Oh... Yeah, buddy,
in-in light of recent events, that's no longer on the menu.
Your mom said something healthy,
but I'm not your mom,
and we're at a bowling alley, so, uh, knock yourself out.
Hey.
I'm really sorry to hear about Archie.
I brought you some lottery tickets and a peach Slurpee.
Sorry, I'm really bad at these things.
No, no, you know what, th... this is great.
I-I love Slurpees in times of uncertainty.
So...
I'm really sorry you have to work during all this.
No, it's part of the job.
I... I just got to step up and stay strong.
And I'm sure he'll be okay.
Yeah.
You really think so?
Lord, my...
question to you is this:
first, you take my husband,
and now you're trying to take my Archie?
If you have got a problem with me...
... just be man enough to say it.
Sure it's a good idea to yell at God, Mom?
Well, he's got a lot of people yapping at him.
I figured the squeaky wheel gets the miracle.
Did you come here looking for me?
No, I...
- I came to do what you're doing. - Yeah.
Just with fewer threats.
I've spent 20 years trying to protect myself from...
having to hurt this way again.
Ma, don't use this as an excuse to go back in your shell.
What shell? I don't have a shell.
I'm just saying...
I think that I've wasted so much time.
I'm scared, too.
I'd be just as lost without him as you would.
Okay, I'm gonna ask the Big Man
to take care of our big man.
I can't do it when you're looking at me.
Well, say something.
I don't see you dawdling when it's time to mail a bill.
Look, Helen, you didn't even give her a chance to talk.
Say something.
The surgery went well.
Is there anything we can do?
He just needs to rest right now.
- Okay. - You can go on in and see him.
There you go. See? Was that so hard?
Sorry.
My gosh.
- Hi, honey. - Hey, Arch.
Hey, buddy.
You look great.
Keep talking to me like that here,
they're gonna be rolling your * to the ER.
You don't need to baby him, he's a grown man.
This feels scratchy. Do you want me to bring
your special blankie from home?
I'll get it for you later.
Listen, Arch.
- Hm? - I wanted to tell you,
and I should've told you
before you had the surgery.
- Yeah? - I l...
Um...
I lo...
I... locked...
my keys in my car.
Well, looks like we're both having a bad day.
You locked your keys in your car?
What are you, AAA?
How you feeling, champ?
I've been better,
but you need to get your * down to the alley.
You need to roll a few games,
keep your arm loose for the Series.
Always in coach mode.
Arch, * the World Series.
I'm staying right here with you.
What do you mean,
* the World Series?
That's not what's important right now.
I'm staying here.
You...
What?
Don't be a damn fool!
Get your * to the alley!
You're in the hospital, Archie. I'm not going anywhere.
You busted your * to get this far!
You can't give up now. Get out of here.
You... you're kicking me out?
I am! He is.
Tom...
Tom. Hey.
What are you doing?
Archie just got out of surgery,
and you're getting him all worked up.
What? All I said was I'm not leaving.
Didn't expect him to yell at me through my mom
like a ventriloquistdummy.
Tom, he is upset with you.
You can't just skip the World Series
after all the work you've put in.
The World S...
Honey, it's just a tournament.
This... this is Archie.
This man stood by me my entire life.
But he told you to go.
- I'm not leaving. - He's gonna be fine.
- What if he needs me? - Tom,
you're not a doctor.
Tell that to the 50 people that have come up to me today.
Oh, my God. Tom.
Okay.
Maybe he doesn't need me,
maybe I need him.
I've bowled 10,000 frames in my life,
and that man's been over my shoulder
for every single one of 'em.
I...
I can't do it without him.
Excuse me, Doctor?
I'm not a doctor.
I was talking to him.
I hear he's very good.
Why are you wearing Archie's clothes?
You said somebody needed to step up. Here I am.
No, man. No, I meant I'm going to step up.
This would never fit you.
You know what, man?
Just take it off, dude. He's gonna kill you.
I'm wearing underwear.
Sorry, I don't know why I lied just now.
It's Archie.
He knows.
"I just wanted to say thanks for running things
while I'm out of commission.
Couldn't be in better hands."
"I love you."
- Oh, Archie, I... - That boy's always been a softie.
Oh, Lew.
Yeah, softer than a stick of butter in the devil's * crack.
Well, now I guess I got to say it back to him.
Why does anyone have to say it?
Why can't you just say it without saying it
and not make such a big damn deal of it?
I mean, people just know, don't they?
You know, you're right.
Besides, he's so busy, he ain't gonna even notice.
Yeah.
I see bubbles.
Aw, man. They're gone.
Hey, is this a good time?
Just finishing this cup of Jell-O.
I eat 5,000 more of these, my insurance pay for itself.
Where's Helen?
She went to get my warm man quilt.
Aw, you mean your special blankie?
When your heart stop,
you can call it whatever the hell you want.
Oh, what's up?
Okay.
It's Tom.
He said he doesn't want to do this without you,
and I'm not sure that he can.
What?
All the work we've put in the past year
has been preparing him for this moment. He's ready.
But I don't know what to do.
Whatever's bothering Tom
has got nothing to do with his game
and everything to do with his head.
I think he just needs his coach.
Look,
the only person who understands the coconut
on that boy's shoulders better than me is you.
What?
I'm not a coach, I'm his wife.
That's just gonna have to do.
But... I can't. I... I wouldn't even know
- what to say... - All right, now, stop, just stop.
Listen now,
before I say what I need to say...
Jen, you're like a daughter to me.
Aw...
Now, don't like a damn fool!
Better get your * to that house
and get that boy's mind right.
Matter with you?
Wow.
I have never been on that side of it before.
Very effective. You are really good.
- Hey. - Hi.
Keeping busy?
- Started with ice cream. - Mm-hmm.
Then I had half a pizza,
now I'm back to the ice cream.
Later, I'm thinking pizza.
Grab me a spoon?
So...
you were right.
You should skip the tournament.
- Really? - Yup.
You should be with Archie. It's for the best.
Okay.
Besides, Lefty Gomez is gonna be there,
and the guy's got a 232 average on tour.
He bowled an 800 series in his last tournament.
Yeah.
For the record, I... I... I beat Lefty Gomez
twice this season.
Little secret, he-he's not even left-handed.
Mm-hmm.
But the oil patterns are brutal.
I mean, you'd have to go
from a short Bear pattern on day one
to a 52-foot Badger pattern the very next day.
That's exactly what Archie and I have been working on
for the past two weeks.
- I'm not afraid of the Bear or the Badger. - Aw...
Good for you. You're adorable.
Pass the chocolate syrup.
And also, what if your shot wasn't working?
Who's gonna tell you to move your feet
or make a ball change?
Me?
You need a coach, babe.
Sweetheart, I-I'm not stupid. I know what you're doing.
Keep doing it.
When we started this,
and I said, "What if we could be the family who wins,"
I didn't mean, "What if we could be the family
who makes it to the Series
and then just doesn't show?"
- Is that who we are? - You know damn well it's not.
You say you care about Archie.
Well, if that's true, you're just gonna throw away
all the years he spent preparing you for this moment?
Because it isn't just your moment,
it's Archie's moment, too.
- Are you done? - Not even close!
You are Tom Freakin' Smallwood.
You bowled three perfect games this season,
finished first in the PTQ rookie year,
you busted your * and made
- so many sacrifices... - So did you.
You're Jen Freakin' Smallwood.
You've been working double time supporting all of us,
all while managing to open up your own salon.
We didn't come all this way
- to give up at the finish line. - No. Keep going.
I'm going to the World Series of Bowling.
- I'm gonna kick some *. - Yes, you are.
- Yes, I am. - Now, are you gonna finish that ice cream,
or are you gonna pack your bag for your first major?
- Both. - Good.
And when you're done,
Archie said you need to get your mind right,
so I'll be upstairs with this
chocolate syrup if you're interested.
I'm interested.
Code Blue!
Oh, you devil.
That is not funny.
- God. - You didn't have to spend the night here, Helen.
Oh, shut it.
It's what you do when you love... hospitals.
Wait. Are you saying you love hospitals?
And I think the hospital knows it.
Well...
I love hospitals, too, sweetheart.
Did someone say "Code Blue"?
Well, yes, I did, but false alarm,
so get the hell out of here. We're having a sweet moment.
Hey, Arch.
You better be in that truck on the way to the World Series,
or I'm-a kick the birthmark off your backside.
Yeah, I saw everything in that sauna.
Relax. I'm on 675 heading out of town right now.
Well, good. Now don't forget,
- that Badger pattern... - Breaks late,
I know.
Well, what in the blue hell
are you calling me for?
To say thank you.
You don't have to thank me for anything.
Come on, Arch.
I think I have to thank you for everything.
Archie, I...
I, uh...
You're welcome.
- Are you crying? - No.
It's indigestion.
Hot sauce?
On the bun.
I'm hanging up now.
All right.
He was totally crying.
Totally.
Well...
Archie's got my game right, you got my mind right,
let's do this.
You got this.
I know there's a lot at stake,
but no matter what happens...
we're gonna be okay.
Sure you're ready for this, Coach?
Keep your damn eyes
on the damn road, and get our damn *es
to the World Series.
Little heavy on the "damns," but, you know,
you'll get there.
Think about a year ago, I was installing
seatbelt brackets on an assembly line.
Now we're on our way to my first PBA major.
Pull over.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
Ah. Are you okay?
Ooh...
I've just been sick the last couple mornings.
Just... just for a second, I was like...
what if she's pregnant?
Why aren't you laughing?
Oh, my God. I... I didn't want to say anything
until after the tournament.
You already have so much to worry about.
- Okay. Okay. - Okay? Okay.
Okay.
- I love you. - I love you, too.
- We're gonna be okay. - Yeah.