WEBVTT 00:00:06.745 --> 00:00:09.096 All right, looks like we're ready to hit the road. 00:00:09.139 --> 00:00:12.055 Is it okay if we don't get all emotional this time? 00:00:12.099 --> 00:00:14.057 I don't get emotional when he leaves for tournaments. 00:00:14.101 --> 00:00:15.450 I'm not talking to you. 00:00:17.669 --> 00:00:18.669 I had allergies. 00:00:19.932 --> 00:00:21.499 Go ahead, check the pollen count for that day. 00:00:23.327 --> 00:00:24.850 I wish I could come, Dad. 00:00:24.894 --> 00:00:26.591 I've never been to one of your tournaments. 00:00:26.635 --> 00:00:28.550 I know, pal. I wish you could come, too. 00:00:28.593 --> 00:00:31.727 I wish you could all come, but this is the Milwaukee PTQ. 00:00:31.770 --> 00:00:33.642 It's my last chance to qualify for the World Series of Bowling. 00:00:33.685 --> 00:00:35.513 I need no distractions. 00:00:35.557 --> 00:00:37.472 Tom's right. The World Series can get him 00:00:37.515 --> 00:00:39.735 into every PBA major next year. 00:00:39.778 --> 00:00:42.085 Bigger tournaments mean bigger money. 00:00:42.129 --> 00:00:44.522 That's right, and we're gonna need that for the off-season. 00:00:44.566 --> 00:00:46.698 Tom and I have a routine that works: 00:00:46.742 --> 00:00:49.223 just the two of us, no distractions. 00:00:49.266 --> 00:00:50.441 That's our secret weapon. 00:00:50.485 --> 00:00:53.227 Yeah, mine is a sock full of nickels 00:00:53.270 --> 00:00:54.619 that I've got hidden under my mattress. 00:00:57.144 --> 00:00:58.144 You understand, though, right, Sam? 00:00:58.145 --> 00:00:59.755 I guess. 00:00:59.798 --> 00:01:02.300 I'm gonna go back to sleep. Good luck, Dad. 00:01:02.304 --> 00:01:04.281 - Thanks, buddy. - We'll wake you up for school. 00:01:04.325 --> 00:01:07.893 Wanna walk me out to the truck, say goodbye? 00:01:07.937 --> 00:01:10.331 Well, it depends. What's the pollen count? 00:01:14.335 --> 00:01:16.076 What? 00:01:16.119 --> 00:01:18.382 - Are you okay? - No. I'm so nervous. 00:01:18.426 --> 00:01:22.343 This is a huge tournament for you, for all of us. 00:01:22.386 --> 00:01:23.908 I know you're under a ton of pressure, 00:01:23.953 --> 00:01:25.737 but are you sure that you don't want me to come? 00:01:25.781 --> 00:01:27.304 Honey, you know I'd love for you to be there, 00:01:27.348 --> 00:01:29.654 but I invite you, I'd have to invite my mom. 00:01:29.698 --> 00:01:31.439 - You know how she can be. - Ugh. 00:01:31.482 --> 00:01:33.537 Okay, I get it. 00:01:33.737 --> 00:01:35.826 I like your *. 00:01:35.870 --> 00:01:37.480 I like your *. 00:01:39.587 --> 00:01:42.808 Oh, Tommy, are you sure you don't want me to come with? 00:01:42.851 --> 00:01:45.462 A boy can always use his mother. 00:01:45.506 --> 00:01:47.421 Ma, you know I'd love for you to be there, 00:01:47.464 --> 00:01:49.684 but if I invite you, I have to invite Jen. 00:01:49.727 --> 00:01:51.207 You know how she can be. 00:01:53.253 --> 00:01:56.778 Yeah, well, at least you and I know the truth, right? 00:01:56.822 --> 00:01:58.258 Right. 00:01:58.301 --> 00:02:00.042 Good luck, son. 00:02:00.086 --> 00:02:02.566 - Thank you. - Don't *. 00:02:06.353 --> 00:02:08.877 - We did the right thing. - Oh, hell yeah, we did. 00:02:08.921 --> 00:02:11.097 We gotta stick with the same routine that we always do. 00:02:11.140 --> 00:02:13.447 Pe-goots-ka. 00:02:13.490 --> 00:02:15.579 Right. 00:02:15.623 --> 00:02:17.712 What? 00:02:17.755 --> 00:02:19.366 Practice... "peh." 00:02:19.409 --> 00:02:21.498 Okay, watch game tape of how the lanes are breaking... 00:02:21.541 --> 00:02:22.541 "goot." 00:02:22.543 --> 00:02:25.067 Sleep... "ss." 00:02:25.111 --> 00:02:28.636 Then kick *... "ka." 00:02:28.678 --> 00:02:30.943 Pegootska! 00:02:30.986 --> 00:02:34.120 Rolls right off the tongue.Right. 00:02:34.163 --> 00:02:35.338 As much as I want everyone there, 00:02:35.382 --> 00:02:36.862 it's the wrong move. 00:02:36.904 --> 00:02:39.038 I need total focus, no distractions. 00:02:39.081 --> 00:02:40.561 "Pegrunska." 00:02:40.604 --> 00:02:42.128 "Pegrunska"? 00:02:43.172 --> 00:02:44.260 "Pendadota." 00:02:45.566 --> 00:02:46.741 Pendadota. 00:02:46.784 --> 00:02:48.916 Pegoo... Pegoot... Pegrats. 00:02:48.961 --> 00:02:50.963 Pegootska! It's easy! 00:03:05.104 --> 00:03:07.193 Honey, calm down, please. Sam is fine. 00:03:07.237 --> 00:03:08.716 We just don't have time to turn around 'cause 00:03:08.760 --> 00:03:10.718 I gotta get to Milwaukee to get my practice time in. 00:03:10.762 --> 00:03:13.983 Okay. I love you. Goodbye. 00:03:14.026 --> 00:03:16.028 Your mom is not very happy with you, young man. 00:03:16.072 --> 00:03:17.725 Frankly, neither am I. 00:03:17.769 --> 00:03:20.032 I'm sorry, I just really wanted to see you bowl. 00:03:20.076 --> 00:03:21.817 I promise I won't be in your way. 00:03:21.860 --> 00:03:24.297 All right. Fine. 00:03:26.430 --> 00:03:29.085 I can't believe Sam would pull a stunt like this. 00:03:29.128 --> 00:03:31.087 Oh, come on. By the time I was his age 00:03:31.130 --> 00:03:35.091 I had already taken my first joyride on a street sweeper. 00:03:35.134 --> 00:03:36.875 Cleaned half the roads in my neighborhood 00:03:36.919 --> 00:03:38.398 before they busted me. 00:03:38.442 --> 00:03:41.488 Not helping. Sam would never make it in juvie. 00:03:41.532 --> 00:03:43.751 He hates sleepovers. 00:03:43.795 --> 00:03:45.449 Well, this might cheer you up. 00:03:45.492 --> 00:03:47.103 I handed out fliers at a high school for our salon. 00:03:47.146 --> 00:03:49.061 Got us booked solid through prom season. 00:03:49.105 --> 00:03:51.063 I also set up a scheduling system 00:03:51.107 --> 00:03:52.717 on our Google page, and organized 00:03:52.760 --> 00:03:55.720 all the combs by height. 00:03:55.763 --> 00:03:57.287 You have been really productive 00:03:57.330 --> 00:03:59.332 since you started this * cleanse. 00:03:59.376 --> 00:04:01.726 I know. I just realized that sleeping around 00:04:01.769 --> 00:04:03.641 was a distraction from what I really want. 00:04:03.684 --> 00:04:05.469 It's been six weeks, 00:04:05.512 --> 00:04:07.514 and I've never felt such a sense of clarity. 00:04:07.558 --> 00:04:09.255 I may never go back to having *. 00:04:14.782 --> 00:04:16.262 What's so funny? 00:04:16.306 --> 00:04:18.264 Oh, please say that bastard squirrel 00:04:18.308 --> 00:04:20.136 finally got snatched up by a hawk. 00:04:21.354 --> 00:04:22.921 Sorry, no such luck. 00:04:22.965 --> 00:04:24.531 This day! 00:04:24.575 --> 00:04:26.969 It's turning into a real steaming cow pie. 00:04:28.144 --> 00:04:30.711 That fuzzy rat lives on to taunt me, 00:04:30.755 --> 00:04:33.279 and Sam pulled a sneaky, underhanded move 00:04:33.323 --> 00:04:35.151 that I should have thought of first. 00:04:36.369 --> 00:04:38.067 Why aren't you guys going to Tom's tournament? 00:04:38.110 --> 00:04:39.546 Isn't it a big one? 00:04:39.590 --> 00:04:41.157 The biggest one yet, but... 00:04:41.200 --> 00:04:43.115 us being there adds to his pressure, 00:04:43.159 --> 00:04:45.291 so we all agreed to just send 00:04:45.335 --> 00:04:47.380 our love and support from here. 00:04:47.424 --> 00:04:49.295 Yeah, and Tommy made it pretty clear who he wants there 00:04:49.339 --> 00:04:51.689 and who he doesn't. 00:04:53.082 --> 00:04:54.605 Exactly. 00:04:59.349 --> 00:05:01.351 So, Lew, you in charge while Archie's away? 00:05:01.394 --> 00:05:03.962 Yep, he said he has full confidence 00:05:04.006 --> 00:05:05.355 in my managerial abilities. 00:05:07.139 --> 00:05:09.402 Plus, he couldn't afford to close the alley for two days, 00:05:09.446 --> 00:05:10.446 so he... 00:05:11.622 --> 00:05:13.276 Well, listen, you're out of straws. 00:05:13.319 --> 00:05:14.973 And I don't drink straight from the glass. 00:05:15.017 --> 00:05:16.801 I'm not an animal. 00:05:19.543 --> 00:05:20.936 Not a problem. 00:05:20.979 --> 00:05:22.372 I'll just go to the supply room... 00:05:22.415 --> 00:05:23.982 Uh-oh. 00:05:24.026 --> 00:05:25.723 Yeah, I lost the key. 00:05:26.811 --> 00:05:28.073 Is that a big deal? 00:05:28.117 --> 00:05:29.945 No, nope, no. 00:05:29.988 --> 00:05:31.772 No, it's nothing to freak out about. 00:05:33.817 --> 00:05:36.125 But it is on the same ring as the key to the front door, 00:05:36.168 --> 00:05:37.604 and I am freaking the hell out about that. 00:05:39.824 --> 00:05:41.652 I'm gonna have to call Archie and tell him. 00:05:41.695 --> 00:05:43.175 Cool, I've never seen somebody 00:05:43.219 --> 00:05:45.264 get murdered over the phone before. 00:05:46.222 --> 00:05:47.832 Wait. 00:05:47.875 --> 00:05:49.312 Wait, no, no, no, Tom has an extra set of keys 00:05:49.355 --> 00:05:51.269 for when he comes to the alley early. 00:05:51.314 --> 00:05:53.011 I can just call Jen and ask if she can bring them over. 00:05:53.055 --> 00:05:54.839 Oh, thank you, Jesus. 00:05:54.882 --> 00:05:57.015 You know, I'm a good guy. 00:05:57.059 --> 00:05:58.799 Why can't I have any joy in my life? 00:06:02.586 --> 00:06:04.022 What are you doing? 00:06:04.066 --> 00:06:06.024 Uh, I'm meditating. 00:06:06.068 --> 00:06:07.634 You know, clearing my mind. 00:06:07.678 --> 00:06:09.375 Oh. 00:06:11.551 --> 00:06:13.597 Why? 00:06:15.120 --> 00:06:18.036 Um, it-it helps me concentrate. 00:06:18.080 --> 00:06:19.559 Before I practice... 00:06:19.603 --> 00:06:21.213 Sam, I-I really have to do this, 00:06:21.257 --> 00:06:23.259 so no more questions about meditating, okay? 00:06:23.302 --> 00:06:24.477 Okay. 00:06:26.914 --> 00:06:28.307 Ba-bam! 00:06:30.962 --> 00:06:32.485 Yeah, we're all signed in. 00:06:32.529 --> 00:06:35.096 Now we only got this lane for half an hour... you done meditating? 00:06:35.097 --> 00:06:36.663 Evidently. 00:06:36.707 --> 00:06:38.274 Well, good. 00:06:38.317 --> 00:06:40.319 Shoot, let's rock and bowl, baby. 00:06:45.629 --> 00:06:46.804 There you are! 00:06:48.632 --> 00:06:50.025 Jen? 00:06:50.067 --> 00:06:52.114 - Hi, Mom. - No. Don't "hi, Mom" me. 00:06:52.157 --> 00:06:53.680 You and I are gonna have a talk. 00:06:53.724 --> 00:06:56.582 Okay, can we have a talk before you guys have a talk? 00:06:57.162 --> 00:06:59.469 Can I talk before you go talk about his talk? 00:06:59.512 --> 00:07:01.123 We got to bowl! 00:07:02.124 --> 00:07:03.951 Good talk. 00:07:03.995 --> 00:07:05.605 Just one second. 00:07:05.649 --> 00:07:07.129 What are you doing here? 00:07:07.172 --> 00:07:08.260 I did not come to bother you. 00:07:08.304 --> 00:07:09.827 I just came for Sam. 00:07:09.870 --> 00:07:10.958 I'm gonna take him home. 00:07:11.002 --> 00:07:12.699 - Sounds good. - Mm-hmm. 00:07:12.743 --> 00:07:14.919 It's actually a huge relief. 00:07:14.962 --> 00:07:17.487 Say no more... this is the most important 24 hours 00:07:17.530 --> 00:07:20.577 of our lives, and our future sort of depends on how you do. 00:07:20.620 --> 00:07:23.275 Which is not what you should be thinking about right now, 00:07:23.319 --> 00:07:25.669 even if it's all that I can. 00:07:25.712 --> 00:07:27.557 I really think after you said, "Say no more," 00:07:27.657 --> 00:07:28.854 you could've said no more. 00:07:29.412 --> 00:07:31.327 All right, we're running out of practice time. 00:07:31.370 --> 00:07:33.372 - Let them go, we got to go. - Okay, you got this. 00:07:36.506 --> 00:07:38.116 You got this. 00:07:46.472 --> 00:07:48.300 Why isn't he bowling? 00:07:51.912 --> 00:07:53.566 Well, that was a total waste of time. 00:07:55.002 --> 00:07:57.483 If I wanted to watch a dummy standing around doing nothing, 00:07:57.527 --> 00:08:00.138 I'd have just gone to the wax museum. 00:08:00.182 --> 00:08:01.531 It wasn't my fault. 00:08:01.574 --> 00:08:03.707 I couldn't focus or concentrate. 00:08:03.750 --> 00:08:06.004 And you never want to go to the wax museum. 00:08:06.623 --> 00:08:09.147 We're sorry, Tom. We didn't mean to distract you. 00:08:09.191 --> 00:08:10.453 Already blew the "peh," 00:08:10.496 --> 00:08:12.019 but we still have the "gootska." 00:08:13.412 --> 00:08:14.761 We're just gonna grab Sam's stuff, 00:08:14.805 --> 00:08:15.936 and we'll be out of your hair. 00:08:15.980 --> 00:08:18.200 Oh! 00:08:18.243 --> 00:08:20.158 Don't worry, Tommy. Mama's here, 00:08:20.202 --> 00:08:21.551 and I'm cooking dinner. 00:08:26.187 --> 00:08:27.525 Ma, what the hell are you doing here? 00:08:27.526 --> 00:08:29.006 Well, I could ask the same thing 00:08:29.007 --> 00:08:31.300 to Miss "I'm just going out for some beer" 00:08:31.342 --> 00:08:35.826 when you know that I always keep a six-pack in my go bag. 00:08:35.869 --> 00:08:37.567 Hey, for your information, 00:08:37.610 --> 00:08:40.525 I just came to get Sam and leave. 00:08:40.570 --> 00:08:42.789 Hey, but if she's staying, so am I. It's only fair. 00:08:42.833 --> 00:08:44.400 Okay? Besides, 00:08:44.443 --> 00:08:46.837 it's me and Sam's future riding on how he does. 00:08:46.880 --> 00:08:50.319 Which you should completely not be thinking about right now. 00:08:50.362 --> 00:08:52.190 Again, sweetheart, the way warnings work 00:08:52.234 --> 00:08:54.061 is you give them before you freak someone out. 00:08:54.105 --> 00:08:55.802 All right, all right, all right. What Tommy needs 00:08:55.846 --> 00:08:58.631 is just some of his mother's Crock-Pot lasagna. 00:08:58.675 --> 00:08:59.850 It's your favorite. 00:08:59.893 --> 00:09:01.591 Ooh! 00:09:01.634 --> 00:09:03.809 Please tell me the edges are all crispy like I like it. 00:09:03.809 --> 00:09:04.376 Arch. 00:09:04.420 --> 00:09:06.030 - Come on, man. - Uh, he... 00:09:06.073 --> 00:09:07.553 - He... he's right. You shouldn't be here. - Oh. 00:09:07.597 --> 00:09:10.252 But I missed my shnookie. 00:09:10.295 --> 00:09:13.429 Come on. Wh-what happened to our secret weapon? 00:09:13.472 --> 00:09:15.213 Pegootska. Pegootska. Pegootska. 00:09:15.257 --> 00:09:18.651 Okay, look, everybody just needs to calm down. 00:09:18.695 --> 00:09:21.045 Tom and I will get another motel room, 00:09:21.088 --> 00:09:23.526 and he can study his game tape in peace and quiet. 00:09:23.639 --> 00:09:25.032 Okay? Well, that's not gonna work. 00:09:25.075 --> 00:09:26.903 Everything's booked up for the tournament. 00:09:26.947 --> 00:09:28.296 This is great. 00:09:28.340 --> 00:09:29.340 - This is just great. - Okay, 00:09:29.341 --> 00:09:31.952 bup-bup-bup-bup-bup. Tom, calm down. You sit here. 00:09:31.995 --> 00:09:33.910 Sit. Here's your laptop. 00:09:33.954 --> 00:09:38.306 Okay. And we will all be completely quiet while you study tape 00:09:38.350 --> 00:09:41.483 and enjoy some of your mother's delicious lasagna. 00:09:41.527 --> 00:09:43.920 - All right, all right. Okay. Yes. - Okay. Thank you. 00:09:43.964 --> 00:09:45.357 Okay. 00:09:49.143 --> 00:09:50.449 Uh-oh. 00:09:55.976 --> 00:09:56.977 Son of a... 00:09:58.500 --> 00:10:00.328 It's over there, it's over there. 00:10:00.372 --> 00:10:01.547 Go. Go. 00:10:05.768 --> 00:10:07.161 Hello? 00:10:07.204 --> 00:10:08.336 Sorry, we're clo... 00:10:08.380 --> 00:10:09.772 Oh, hi. 00:10:09.816 --> 00:10:13.385 I mean, hi. 00:10:13.428 --> 00:10:15.778 I'm Tia. Jen asked me to drop off this key. 00:10:15.822 --> 00:10:17.867 - Are you Lew? - Yes, I am. 00:10:17.911 --> 00:10:20.174 Yep. We... we've actually met before. 00:10:20.217 --> 00:10:23.046 We have? Yeah. We went to high school together? 00:10:23.090 --> 00:10:25.353 Y-you were... You were a cheerleader. I was in band. 00:10:25.397 --> 00:10:26.789 You were in a band? 00:10:27.790 --> 00:10:30.097 Nah, I was in band. 00:10:30.140 --> 00:10:31.533 - Oh. - I was in band. Yeah. 00:10:31.577 --> 00:10:32.969 The marching band. 00:10:33.013 --> 00:10:34.623 Well, sorry. I'm terrible with faces. 00:10:34.667 --> 00:10:36.233 You wouldn't believe how many guys 00:10:36.277 --> 00:10:38.192 I've woken up next to and was like, "Have we met?" 00:10:40.237 --> 00:10:41.326 Same here. 00:10:42.327 --> 00:10:44.372 What? 00:10:44.416 --> 00:10:48.376 - Uh, well, uh, here you go, Lew. - Yes. 00:10:48.420 --> 00:10:49.812 Thank you. 00:10:49.856 --> 00:10:51.074 - Um, let me go just make sure it works. - Yeah. 00:10:51.118 --> 00:10:52.685 Yeah. 00:10:52.728 --> 00:10:54.513 Just one second here. 00:10:54.556 --> 00:10:56.428 Okay. 00:10:58.038 --> 00:10:59.518 Uh-oh. 00:11:02.303 --> 00:11:04.218 You know what? It... 00:11:04.261 --> 00:11:06.394 It's probably all them weights I've been lifting. 00:11:07.613 --> 00:11:09.223 That's what it is. 00:11:09.266 --> 00:11:11.791 You probably should call a locksmith, I guess? 00:11:11.834 --> 00:11:13.227 Yes. Uh... 00:11:13.270 --> 00:11:14.837 Oh, it's-it's too late. 00:11:14.881 --> 00:11:17.500 I'm not gonna be able to get anyone out here until morning. 00:11:17.801 --> 00:11:19.059 So what are you gonna do? 00:11:19.102 --> 00:11:20.582 I mean, you can't keep the door unlocked all night. 00:11:20.626 --> 00:11:23.063 It's not a big deal. 00:11:23.106 --> 00:11:25.544 You know, I-I'll just hang out here until then. 00:11:25.587 --> 00:11:27.763 My mom... my-my roommate. 00:11:27.807 --> 00:11:31.158 My roommate. My roommate will understand. 00:11:37.033 --> 00:11:39.819 I thought firemen were supposed to be nice. 00:11:41.473 --> 00:11:43.866 America's heroes, my sweet *. 00:11:44.867 --> 00:11:47.000 I can't believe they would evacuate 00:11:47.043 --> 00:11:50.220 an entire motel over one smoke detector. 00:11:50.264 --> 00:11:53.659 Or that the people upstairs are clearly filming a *o. 00:11:55.356 --> 00:11:59.578 What I can't believe is they had to take the lasagna as "evidence." 00:12:00.666 --> 00:12:02.798 Lying bastards. You know damn well 00:12:02.842 --> 00:12:04.496 they going to town on that thing right now. 00:12:04.539 --> 00:12:06.715 Okay, all right. Enough. 00:12:06.759 --> 00:12:08.804 I didn't get to practice or watch game tape. 00:12:08.848 --> 00:12:11.285 The "pegoot" is out the window. 00:12:11.328 --> 00:12:13.461 If I want a shot at the "ska," 00:12:13.505 --> 00:12:15.332 I need to rest. Right now. 00:12:15.376 --> 00:12:17.639 Okay, okay. Everyone, I... It's really late. 00:12:17.683 --> 00:12:18.858 We're all on edge. 00:12:18.901 --> 00:12:21.077 Let's just go to bed. 00:12:21.121 --> 00:12:23.036 That bed? 00:12:24.298 --> 00:12:27.127 Okay. 00:12:27.170 --> 00:12:29.085 - Ow. - Shh. Shh! 00:12:31.566 --> 00:12:33.873 Can someone get the light? 00:12:33.916 --> 00:12:35.875 I'll get the light. 00:12:40.227 --> 00:12:41.707 Unbelievable. 00:12:41.750 --> 00:12:43.230 - Unbelievable! - H... honey, 00:12:43.273 --> 00:12:45.145 - calm down. It was an accident. - Okay, look, 00:12:45.188 --> 00:12:47.495 this is not a vacation for me. I am at work right now. 00:12:47.539 --> 00:12:49.541 We're all uncomfortable. Someone has their foot 00:12:49.584 --> 00:12:51.325 parked between my cheeks 00:12:51.368 --> 00:12:53.675 like a bike rack. 00:12:53.719 --> 00:12:55.155 This isn't about you. 00:12:55.198 --> 00:12:57.636 This isn't about any of you. I-It's my * 00:12:57.679 --> 00:12:59.812 - that's on the line tomorrow. - Hey, take it easy. 00:12:59.855 --> 00:13:00.943 I don't have that luxury. 00:13:00.987 --> 00:13:02.510 If I make one mistake tomorrow, 00:13:02.554 --> 00:13:04.033 one mistake, this whole thing goes away. 00:13:04.077 --> 00:13:05.078 All the pressure's on me! 00:13:05.121 --> 00:13:06.949 Okay, honey, it's gonna be okay. 00:13:06.993 --> 00:13:09.125 You don't know that. I don't know that. 00:13:09.169 --> 00:13:12.128 - What are you saying, Tommy? - I'm saying you shouldn't have come. 00:13:12.172 --> 00:13:14.783 Enjoy the bed. I... I'm gonna sleep in the tub. 00:13:21.877 --> 00:13:22.965 Can I get a pillow, please? 00:13:26.578 --> 00:13:27.883 Can I get a white one? 00:13:28.667 --> 00:13:30.320 They don't wash these! 00:13:34.890 --> 00:13:37.893 Hey, thanks again for staying with me. 00:13:37.937 --> 00:13:40.505 - I hope it didn't upset any plans. - No. 00:13:40.548 --> 00:13:44.247 I haven't been going out much since I started my * cleanse. 00:13:44.291 --> 00:13:47.381 Oh, * cleanse? What's that? Like, doing it in the shower? 00:13:49.209 --> 00:13:52.038 No, it's like not doing it at all. 00:13:52.081 --> 00:13:53.909 I just felt like my life was out of control, 00:13:53.953 --> 00:13:56.564 and I was sleeping with every other guy I met. 00:13:56.608 --> 00:13:58.218 You know, the old me 00:13:58.261 --> 00:13:59.785 would probably be going at it with you right now. 00:13:59.828 --> 00:14:01.526 Oh. 00:14:01.569 --> 00:14:03.528 Well, 00:14:03.571 --> 00:14:06.531 good riddance, old her. 00:14:13.842 --> 00:14:15.104 So... 00:14:19.282 --> 00:14:20.414 You okay? 00:14:23.460 --> 00:14:26.115 So, what's your number? 00:14:26.159 --> 00:14:29.162 Oh, it's 989-79... No, 00:14:29.205 --> 00:14:30.816 I meant, like, your number-number. 00:14:30.859 --> 00:14:32.382 Like how many people you've slept with. 00:14:32.426 --> 00:14:34.820 Oh. 00:14:34.863 --> 00:14:36.256 Oh, it's okay. You don't have to tell me. 00:14:36.299 --> 00:14:38.650 No, it's okay. I could tell you. It's, uh... 00:14:38.693 --> 00:14:39.825 How about we say it at the same time? 00:14:39.868 --> 00:14:41.566 Okay. 00:14:41.609 --> 00:14:43.132 - It's three. - 31. 00:14:43.176 --> 00:14:44.830 Three-tee-one! 00:14:44.873 --> 00:14:47.180 What the heck? It's the same as you. 00:14:47.223 --> 00:14:48.398 That's wild! 00:14:48.442 --> 00:14:49.791 That's so crazy. 00:15:12.597 --> 00:15:14.947 Oh, good morning. 00:15:14.990 --> 00:15:18.080 Damn mattress was a little too soft. 00:15:20.082 --> 00:15:21.301 Was it? 00:15:23.346 --> 00:15:25.000 Do you have the imprint of a nonslip shower mat 00:15:25.044 --> 00:15:26.828 on your back and most of your *? 00:15:29.309 --> 00:15:32.225 Well, somebody woke up on the wrong side of the tub. 00:15:33.530 --> 00:15:35.054 What's going on? Where is everybody? 00:15:35.097 --> 00:15:36.142 They went home. 00:15:36.185 --> 00:15:37.665 What? 00:15:37.709 --> 00:15:40.233 - Were they mad? - No. 00:15:40.276 --> 00:15:42.670 Matter of fact, they told me to tell you that they were wrong 00:15:42.714 --> 00:15:45.064 and they shouldn't have come and they're sorry. 00:15:46.892 --> 00:15:49.459 Okay. That's good. That's good. 00:15:49.503 --> 00:15:52.027 That's what we wanted. Now-now we can salvage 00:15:52.071 --> 00:15:54.029 what's left of this tournament. 00:15:55.378 --> 00:15:57.076 I mean, if you think I have a chance. 00:15:57.119 --> 00:15:58.512 Yeah, when you got the best coach in the world, 00:15:58.555 --> 00:15:59.905 you always have a chance. 00:16:01.471 --> 00:16:03.256 All right, put some pants on that nonslip *. 00:16:03.299 --> 00:16:04.910 Let's get the hell up out of here, man. 00:16:07.739 --> 00:16:09.436 You're going to the free breakfast, aren't you? 00:16:09.479 --> 00:16:11.133 Damn right, I'm going to free breakfast. 00:16:20.273 --> 00:16:21.666 Ugh. 00:16:24.538 --> 00:16:27.715 Well, that was an interesting night. 00:16:29.369 --> 00:16:32.328 I don't remember anything after our karaoke duet. 00:16:33.720 --> 00:16:35.549 That was fun. 00:16:35.592 --> 00:16:38.465 I never sang "Islands in the Stream" before. 00:16:38.508 --> 00:16:39.727 Oh, no, no, I have. 00:16:39.771 --> 00:16:41.686 - Just not the man's part. - Right. 00:16:42.861 --> 00:16:44.166 - Oh! - Oh! 00:16:47.953 --> 00:16:49.519 Wait. 00:16:49.563 --> 00:16:51.783 Wait, did we... ? 00:16:51.826 --> 00:16:53.915 No. You had way too much to drink, 00:16:53.959 --> 00:16:55.177 and I was a perfect gentleman. 00:16:56.439 --> 00:16:58.354 Well, 00:16:58.398 --> 00:17:00.616 phew. 00:17:02.663 --> 00:17:05.057 But I had an amazing time with you. 00:17:05.100 --> 00:17:06.628 You're a really great guy. 00:17:06.811 --> 00:17:08.204 I'll have the usual for breakfast, 00:17:08.246 --> 00:17:09.596 but for lunch, I'm thinking I'll get a... 00:17:09.640 --> 00:17:11.120 Whoa. 00:17:13.339 --> 00:17:14.819 What the hell happened here? 00:17:18.605 --> 00:17:19.824 Nothing. 00:17:32.619 --> 00:17:34.404 Hey. 00:17:34.447 --> 00:17:37.015 - How you feeling? - Cramped. Achy. 00:17:37.058 --> 00:17:39.844 Think that bathtub gave me athlete's foot on my face. 00:17:41.237 --> 00:17:43.456 I got athlete's face, Archie. 00:17:45.241 --> 00:17:47.199 I didn't watch tape. I didn't practice. 00:17:47.243 --> 00:17:48.635 - I don't know how the hell I'm gonna beat these guys. - All right, 00:17:48.635 --> 00:17:51.029 listen, don't think about that right now, okay? 00:17:51.072 --> 00:17:52.857 Close your eyes for a minute. 00:17:52.900 --> 00:17:56.469 Just concentrate on what's really important. 00:17:56.513 --> 00:17:58.602 Why you're doing this, who you're doing it for. 00:17:58.645 --> 00:18:01.082 That's the only thing that matters. 00:18:02.258 --> 00:18:04.999 Arch, I messed up, man. 00:18:05.043 --> 00:18:06.740 I-I *ed up big-time. 00:18:09.917 --> 00:18:11.832 All right, listen, you need to relax. 00:18:11.876 --> 00:18:13.530 This happens sometimes 00:18:13.573 --> 00:18:16.054 when you're under stress. 00:18:16.097 --> 00:18:17.882 I brought extra underwear. 00:18:21.886 --> 00:18:23.104 Not that! 00:18:24.193 --> 00:18:26.064 I... I... I meant my family. 00:18:26.107 --> 00:18:27.892 They're what matters most to me. 00:18:27.935 --> 00:18:29.459 I mean, Sam was only asking me all those questions 00:18:29.502 --> 00:18:31.287 because he's proud of what I do. 00:18:31.330 --> 00:18:34.246 And Jen drove all the way here just to help me out. 00:18:34.290 --> 00:18:36.074 My mom sped through three states 00:18:36.117 --> 00:18:37.510 with a Crock-Pot on her dashboard 00:18:37.554 --> 00:18:39.338 just so I could have my favorite meal, 00:18:39.382 --> 00:18:40.383 and what did I do? 00:18:40.426 --> 00:18:42.428 I-I yelled at them for it. 00:18:42.472 --> 00:18:43.995 You did. 00:18:44.038 --> 00:18:45.562 I wouldn't be here without them. 00:18:45.605 --> 00:18:48.260 I shouldn't be here without them. 00:18:48.304 --> 00:18:50.219 Oh, don't worry, man. 00:18:50.262 --> 00:18:52.917 You worry too much. 00:18:52.960 --> 00:18:55.311 Got the best damn coach out of all these chumps. 00:18:56.964 --> 00:19:00.098 I'm sorry, Arch. A good coach is not what I need right now. 00:19:00.141 --> 00:19:01.317 I need to make this right. 00:19:02.492 --> 00:19:05.408 Jen, hey. Listen, 00:19:05.451 --> 00:19:07.497 I am so sorry I yelled like that. 00:19:07.540 --> 00:19:10.674 I-I... Could you maybe come back? 00:19:12.676 --> 00:19:14.634 Sweetheart, I-I'm having a hard time hearing you. 00:19:14.678 --> 00:19:16.636 It sounds... 00:19:16.680 --> 00:19:19.813 It sounds like you're in a really big crowd. 00:19:22.860 --> 00:19:25.950 I called them and told them to turn around. 00:19:25.993 --> 00:19:27.995 Like I said, 00:19:28.039 --> 00:19:31.085 best damn coach. 00:19:32.870 --> 00:19:34.088 "Bedooca." 00:19:35.873 --> 00:19:38.005 Rolls right off the tongue. 00:19:38.049 --> 00:19:39.703 Thanks, Arch. 00:19:39.746 --> 00:19:41.182 You want to know how to thank me? 00:19:41.226 --> 00:19:43.141 Take your bath mat * out there 00:19:43.184 --> 00:19:45.926 and bring this thing home, okay? 00:19:45.970 --> 00:19:47.754 For all of us. 00:19:48.755 --> 00:19:50.322 You got this, honey! 00:19:50.366 --> 00:19:52.542 - Go, Dad! - Yeah, son! 00:19:52.585 --> 00:19:55.675 You can wipe the floor with these hamburger clowns! 00:19:58.374 --> 00:19:59.984 You want to tell your family to pipe down? 00:20:01.768 --> 00:20:02.987 No. 00:20:04.380 --> 00:20:06.164 No, I do not. 00:20:06.207 --> 00:20:08.166 Plus, they would... They wouldn't listen to me, anyway. 00:20:09.559 --> 00:20:10.908 Yeah! 00:20:15.956 --> 00:20:17.349 - Thank you, Lew. - Fresh beer. 00:20:17.393 --> 00:20:18.785 - Yes, yes, yes. Fresh beer. - Drink up. 00:20:18.829 --> 00:20:21.310 First place in PTQ. I'm so proud of you. 00:20:21.353 --> 00:20:23.486 - Thank you. - That's right, baby. You did it. 00:20:23.529 --> 00:20:25.231 - World Series of Bowling, here we come. - Let's go. 00:20:25.524 --> 00:20:26.786 Maybe a softer tub?