WEBVTT

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Hey, Mom.

00:00:30.243 --> 00:00:31.995
Want to buy a worm?

00:00:32.078 --> 00:00:35.206
Oh, for crying out loud.

00:00:35.248 --> 00:00:37.584
Well, let's get you cleaned up.

00:00:37.584 --> 00:00:40.211
Okay!

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Hey, you!

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When Francis is home,
anything we do is fun.

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I mean, we're
just watching

00:01:19.209 --> 00:01:21.503
some stupid TV show,
but it doesn't matter.

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This totally rules.

00:01:22.879 --> 00:01:24.172
This totally *!

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Isn't there anything fun
to do around here?

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I've got some chalk.

00:01:28.510 --> 00:01:31.012
We could draw some dead guy
outlines on the sidewalk.

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Boring.

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Mom's not home.

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We could play
cantaloupe ball.

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We did that last time
I was home.

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Come on, guys, think!

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I'd be up for the
chalk outline thing.

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Now, Jellybean
likes to have

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a half-cup of wet food
in one bowl

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and a half-cup of dry
in another.

00:01:54.577 --> 00:01:55.703
Now, he likes the juice

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from the wet half
poured onto the dry.

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Now, no overfeeding.

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I mean that, mister.

00:02:02.377 --> 00:02:03.753
Okay, maybe tomorrow.

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I can't say no to you.

00:02:05.380 --> 00:02:07.048
Craig, can we
speed things up?

00:02:07.090 --> 00:02:08.383
We've got Jellybean's
emergency numbers.

00:02:08.424 --> 00:02:09.384
We know where
his sweaters are.

00:02:09.425 --> 00:02:10.927
You showed us how to take
his temperature.

00:02:10.969 --> 00:02:12.303
Is there anything else
Dewey needs to know?

00:02:12.303 --> 00:02:14.389
I guess that's it, sport.

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Now, taking care
of another living thing

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is a big responsibility.

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Are you sure you're up
to the challenge?

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Mm-hmm.

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Don't worry, Craig.
I have a feeling

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Dewey's going to
do a great job.

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Great, and when
the long weekend is over,

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you'll have earned
five whole dollars.

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You told Mom ten.
Right, ten.

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Aren't you a good
little listener?
Ow!

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I'm not so sure
about this, Hal.

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Are you sure that Dewey
can handle this?

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Aw, it's no
big deal, honey.

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A job is a good
thing for a boy.

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It teaches him
the value of money.

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It gives him a little
self-confidence.

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Besides, Craig's
new place

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is only two blocks
from our house.

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Hey, you can see
our backyard from here.

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Hey... I almost forgot
to show you my itinerary.

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Yeah, the convention lasts
three days.

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I'll be back
early Monday evening.

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Wow, Craig, I had no idea
you were so into comic books.

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Well, it's not like
I'm a freak about it.

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It just helps me keep
my life in perspective.

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You know, somehow my problems
seem insignificant

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when compared to Richie Rich's.

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Well, it's time to say good-bye,
Jelly Belly.

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Come give Daddy
some kissy-kisses.

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I love you...

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Yes, I do-do-do...
do-do-do-do-...

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I know, son, but
a job's a job.

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Big news, guys.

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Things are going to get a lot
more interesting around here.

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What's up?

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I forget--

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you guys enjoy wrestling,
don't you?

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Rage in the Cage?!

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Oh, my God!
You're the best brother ever!

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We're going to have
so much f...

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That's only two tickets.

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I know.

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How am I ever going to decide
which one of you to take?

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You deliberately bought
two tickets just to torment us?

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No, of course not.

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I bought them to see
who loves me the most.

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Now, I know you
both love me...

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but I bet one of you loves me
just a little bit more.

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No. No way. We're not doing
another *-kissing contest.

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There's got to be
another way.

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Okay, fine.
Who's got a quarter?

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Here.
Great.

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You're in the lead.

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Maybe you should make me
a sandwich.

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Oh, come on, guys.
It's Rage in the Cage!

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You should be happy!

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We are happy.

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Well, you're not doing
the happy dance.

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Happy dance, happy dance,
we love to do the happy dance.

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Happier.

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Happy dance, happy dance,

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we love to do the happy dance.

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Happier.

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Happy dance, happy dance,
we love to do the...!

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A half-cup of wet food
in one bowl

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and a half-cup of dry
in another.

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He likes the juice
from the wet half

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poured onto the dry.

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Jellybean also likes you
better than your brothers.

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Everyone likes you better
than your brothers.

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Someday, you're going to be
president of Idaho

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and anyone taller than you
will be fed to wolves.

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Time for your eardrops,
Jellybean.

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Okay, come on.

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Please don't go
outside, Jellybean.

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Don't be scared, Jellybean.

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They're just eardrops. See?

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Jellybean!

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Jellybean!

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Turn.

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Hey, Ma, can I borrow the car
to go over to Richie's house?

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Uh, no.

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Why not?

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Because whenever you return
the car, it's always filthy.

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That is so unfair.

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You always *ume
the worst of me.

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*ume? I see it.

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How am I going to show you
that I've actually grown up

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if you never give me
the chance?!

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Okay, I'm listening.

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Okay, how about if I wash
the car before I take it?

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And I'll rake the leaves
and I'll scoop out the gutters,

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and if that's not enough,
I'll clean the whole attic!

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Mom, give him a break.

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Okay, you got yourself a deal.

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Bring it home in one piece.

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You need anything ironed,
Mom?

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Dewey? You in here, son?

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What's wrong, son?

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You were supposed to
be home hours ago.

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I can't do anything right.

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Dewey.

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Where's Jellybean?

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I left the door open,
and he ran away.

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Oh, dear.

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Do we have to tell Mom?

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Well, this is a very
serious situation, son.

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Of course we're not going
to tell your mother.

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Really?

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Really.

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But I think it might
be a little bit

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too much responsibility
for your first job.

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Hey, don't worry,
we'll find Jellybean.

00:07:36.752 --> 00:07:38.629
But I've been looking for hours.

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Well, that's your
first lesson, Dewey.

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Sometimes it takes a lot
of time and hard work

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to accomplish something.

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But what if
Jellybean's hurt?

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It's dark outside.

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Let me tell you
a little something

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about cats, all right?

00:07:51.100 --> 00:07:52.643
They're nocturnal creatures,

00:07:52.685 --> 00:07:55.938
which means they
prefer the night.

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Then again, so do
coyotes and feral dogs

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and devil worshippers.

00:08:02.236 --> 00:08:05.573
My point is that
Jellybean is fine.

00:08:05.615 --> 00:08:08.242
He'll come home when
he's good and ready.

00:08:08.284 --> 00:08:10.828
We're just going to put
a little bowl of food out,

00:08:10.870 --> 00:08:13.289
and he'll come back.

00:08:13.331 --> 00:08:14.957
Are you sure?

00:08:14.957 --> 00:08:19.420
Trust me, tomorrow morning,
everything is going to be fine.

00:08:23.799 --> 00:08:26.469
Dad! Jellybean's bowl is empty!

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He was here!

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You're the smartest man
in the world!

00:08:30.765 --> 00:08:32.350
Yes!

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No sign of forced entry.

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I just don't see how
these guys got in.

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It's a mystery.

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You left
the window open.

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Mystery solved.
I'm sorry,

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what is it you say
you're doing here again?

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We're watching the cat
while the owner's away.

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I don't see a cat.

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We're not doing
a very good job.

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Hello?

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Hal?

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Oh, Craig! Hi!

00:09:07.718 --> 00:09:08.844
How's the convention?

00:09:08.886 --> 00:09:10.012
Fantastic.

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I've picked up
some great bargains.

00:09:11.973 --> 00:09:15.101
You would not believe some of
the idiots that are here.

00:09:15.142 --> 00:09:18.479
Anyhow, I just called
to see how Jellybean's doing.

00:09:18.521 --> 00:09:20.898
Oh, fine. He's a frisky
little guy, you know.

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Oh, get off the TV,
Jellybean!

00:09:23.234 --> 00:09:24.485
That reminds me--

00:09:24.527 --> 00:09:26.737
could you hit the timer button
on my VCR?

00:09:26.821 --> 00:09:27.738
I want to tape  Arliss.

00:09:27.822 --> 00:09:30.032
Uh...

00:09:30.032 --> 00:09:33.035
Sure, no problem.

00:09:33.077 --> 00:09:36.747
Hey, Hal, um, I don't want you
to think I'm weird, but...

00:09:36.831 --> 00:09:39.041
could you put Jellybean
on the phone?

00:09:39.083 --> 00:09:42.211
Uh, yeah, let me just...

00:09:42.211 --> 00:09:43.754
pick him up, yeah...

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There he is!

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Okay...

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Okay, I got his ear
to the phone!

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Hey, Jellybean!

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How's my widdle *cat?

00:09:51.846 --> 00:09:53.598
Have you been a good boy

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while I've been away?

00:09:59.186 --> 00:10:00.896
I love you, honey.

00:10:00.938 --> 00:10:02.773
Give Daddy a kiss.

00:10:03.941 --> 00:10:05.776
Jellybean?

00:10:07.737 --> 00:10:10.573
I got to tell you, Reese,
you are doing a great job.

00:10:10.573 --> 00:10:12.366
I am very impressed.

00:10:12.408 --> 00:10:13.701
Thank you.

00:10:13.743 --> 00:10:14.744
Here?

00:10:14.785 --> 00:10:18.080
Nah, one over.

00:10:18.122 --> 00:10:20.374
I just want to point out

00:10:20.416 --> 00:10:22.168
that Malcolm has not
done a thing,

00:10:22.209 --> 00:10:25.004
and I have been carrying
you around all afternoon.

00:10:25.046 --> 00:10:26.339
Don't think your enthusiasm

00:10:26.380 --> 00:10:27.757
and that pathetic
look of desperation

00:10:27.840 --> 00:10:28.924
are going unnoticed.

00:10:28.924 --> 00:10:29.842
Here you go, Francis.

00:10:29.884 --> 00:10:31.218
What's this?

00:10:31.260 --> 00:10:32.845
Your English term paper

00:10:32.887 --> 00:10:33.846
on the rise of the novel.

00:10:33.888 --> 00:10:35.598
It's a guaranteed "A."

00:10:35.681 --> 00:10:37.516
You can * off the whole
rest of this semester

00:10:37.558 --> 00:10:38.768
and still pull a "C."

00:10:40.936 --> 00:10:43.606
This pleases me.

00:10:56.577 --> 00:10:58.079
Jellybean!

00:10:58.120 --> 00:10:59.455
Come on, Jellybean.

00:10:59.455 --> 00:11:01.707
Come to Hal.

00:11:01.999 --> 00:11:05.086
That's a good *cat.

00:11:05.086 --> 00:11:07.838
Stay right where you... Damn!

00:11:09.340 --> 00:11:10.966
What is it?

00:11:12.259 --> 00:11:13.803
What?

00:11:13.844 --> 00:11:15.304
You know, I realized something.

00:11:15.346 --> 00:11:17.848
You could do Francis's homework
for the next ten years,

00:11:17.848 --> 00:11:20.142
but you still can't go
to Rage in the Cage

00:11:20.184 --> 00:11:21.185
if you're grounded.

00:11:21.268 --> 00:11:22.770
What are you talking about?

00:11:23.521 --> 00:11:25.981
Mom!

00:11:34.281 --> 00:11:35.199
What is with
you, Reese?

00:11:35.282 --> 00:11:36.659
You've got to get in there

00:11:36.701 --> 00:11:38.202
and see what Malcolm
did to Dewey.

00:11:38.285 --> 00:11:39.870
He's totally lost it!
Hey, Mom.

00:11:39.954 --> 00:11:41.205
Where's Dewey?

00:11:41.288 --> 00:11:43.541
He left early
to go feed Craig's cat.

00:11:43.541 --> 00:11:45.334
No way!

00:11:47.378 --> 00:11:48.421
Huh?

00:11:48.462 --> 00:11:51.048
What is going on
with you, Reese?

00:11:55.219 --> 00:11:58.222
Oh!

00:12:02.226 --> 00:12:04.854
Dewey, wait till you
see who I found...

00:12:04.895 --> 00:12:06.021
What happened to your face?

00:12:06.063 --> 00:12:07.565
What happened to your pants?

00:12:07.606 --> 00:12:09.233
Never mind that.

00:12:09.275 --> 00:12:11.360
Look who I have.

00:12:11.402 --> 00:12:13.279
Mrs. Johnson's cat?

00:12:13.320 --> 00:12:16.907
Yes... Mrs. Johnson's
cat, yes!

00:12:16.907 --> 00:12:18.743
Go, scoot.

00:12:58.491 --> 00:13:01.702
Hey! I found these in
the laundry in my shirt pocket!

00:13:01.744 --> 00:13:03.662
You put them there,
didn't you?!

00:13:03.704 --> 00:13:07.416
Yeah, just like you put my muddy
sneaker on the kitchen table!

00:13:07.458 --> 00:13:09.668
Guys, what's going on?

00:13:09.710 --> 00:13:12.087
He's trying to get me grounded
so I can't go with you,

00:13:12.129 --> 00:13:13.506
but he's too stupid
to pull it off!

00:13:13.547 --> 00:13:15.090
We'll see who's stupid
when this stupid

00:13:15.132 --> 00:13:16.467
is watching
a wrestling match.

00:13:16.509 --> 00:13:17.802
Whoa, guys, this is

00:13:17.843 --> 00:13:19.428
supposed to be
a contest about love,

00:13:19.470 --> 00:13:22.306
and you've twisted it
into something ugly.

00:13:22.348 --> 00:13:23.307
Carry on.

00:13:24.767 --> 00:13:27.186
Get off me!
Get off! Ow!

00:13:27.228 --> 00:13:30.147
This, too, pleases me.

00:13:30.189 --> 00:13:32.942
Okay, we can fix this.

00:13:32.983 --> 00:13:34.819
Cats are territorial.

00:13:34.902 --> 00:13:37.780
I'd put money on it
that Jellybean hasn't been

00:13:37.822 --> 00:13:40.324
outside a square block
of this place.

00:13:40.407 --> 00:13:41.617
Ooh!

00:13:41.659 --> 00:13:43.828
Yup, he's been back.

00:13:45.412 --> 00:13:46.539
These are fresh.

00:13:46.622 --> 00:13:48.207
But he never stays.

00:13:48.290 --> 00:13:50.543
Well, then we'll just
have to find

00:13:50.626 --> 00:13:52.545
a way to keep him here,
won't we?

00:13:52.628 --> 00:13:54.964
Paid a little visit
to my doctor.

00:13:55.005 --> 00:13:55.840
What are those?

00:13:55.881 --> 00:13:58.968
These are sleeping pills,
Dewey.

00:13:59.009 --> 00:14:01.470
I simply told him I've been up
for the past few nights,

00:14:01.512 --> 00:14:03.472
things aren't going
well with the wife,

00:14:03.514 --> 00:14:06.851
afraid I'm going
to lose the house...

00:14:06.892 --> 00:14:08.394
But don't you worry, son.

00:14:08.435 --> 00:14:10.688
Those are just lies I told
to get prescription drugs.

00:14:10.729 --> 00:14:12.857
Now, we're just going
to grind a few of these up,

00:14:12.898 --> 00:14:14.483
sprinkle it on his food,

00:14:14.525 --> 00:14:16.694
and it's sweet
dreams, Jellybean.

00:14:16.735 --> 00:14:19.363
Should we put them
in the wet or the dry?

00:14:19.363 --> 00:14:20.489
The wet, dry, milk, water--

00:14:20.531 --> 00:14:22.491
we have to cover
all our bases, son.

00:14:22.533 --> 00:14:24.577
We are going to get this cat!

00:14:30.165 --> 00:14:32.501
Which one's Jellybean?

00:14:32.543 --> 00:14:34.461
Well, that's
another challenge.

00:14:34.503 --> 00:14:36.463
We'll make three piles:

00:14:36.505 --> 00:14:39.133
"Probably Not Jellybean,"
"Definitely Not Jellybean,"

00:14:39.174 --> 00:14:40.509
and... "Not Even a Cat."

00:14:40.551 --> 00:14:42.386
We'll start with that possum.

00:14:42.469 --> 00:14:44.889
I think it's time
to call Mom.

00:14:44.889 --> 00:14:47.683
I was hoping you'd say that.

00:14:52.938 --> 00:14:55.608
Rage in the Cage.
Rage in the Cage.

00:14:55.691 --> 00:14:57.359
What are you doing?

00:14:57.401 --> 00:14:59.612
Wait till Mom sees what you did
to my expensive microscope.

00:14:59.695 --> 00:15:01.238
You don't have the guts.

00:15:01.280 --> 00:15:02.448
Say you quit, Reese.

00:15:02.448 --> 00:15:05.159
No! You're going
to totally be grounded

00:15:05.200 --> 00:15:07.328
when Mom sees
the beating you gave me.

00:15:09.580 --> 00:15:10.539
What are you doing?

00:15:15.461 --> 00:15:17.963
Oh, yeah? Oh, yeah?

00:15:28.599 --> 00:15:30.142
Hey, hey, hey!

00:15:30.184 --> 00:15:32.561
This isn't about
the tickets, is it?

00:15:32.603 --> 00:15:34.980
You have to decide.
Who's going with you?!

00:15:35.022 --> 00:15:37.441
Oh, yeah, I probably should've
said something.

00:15:37.524 --> 00:15:39.693
I met this girl
at the Burger Barn,

00:15:39.735 --> 00:15:40.444
and guess what?

00:15:40.527 --> 00:15:41.946
She likes wrestling.

00:15:42.029 --> 00:15:44.281
What? You can't.

00:15:44.323 --> 00:15:45.658
Guys, it's a  girl...

00:15:45.741 --> 00:15:47.660
who likes  wrestling.

00:15:47.743 --> 00:15:50.537
I'm just as much
a victim as you are.

00:15:52.331 --> 00:15:54.416
Aw, you'll understand
when you're older.

00:15:54.458 --> 00:15:55.918
You guys are cool.

00:15:55.960 --> 00:15:58.629
I'm definitely bringing you home
a couple programs.

00:16:01.465 --> 00:16:03.676
You're telling me
none of these cats is Jellybean?

00:16:03.759 --> 00:16:05.302
What's wrong with you?!

00:16:05.344 --> 00:16:07.805
Come on, Lois, this is a
very complicated situation.

00:16:07.805 --> 00:16:09.473
Don't blame Dewey.

00:16:09.473 --> 00:16:10.683
I am not blaming Dewey.

00:16:10.808 --> 00:16:13.018
Okay, I'll say it.

00:16:13.060 --> 00:16:16.021
It was a really bad idea.

00:16:17.564 --> 00:16:19.191
I'll tell you
one thing--

00:16:19.233 --> 00:16:21.694
I've never seen 50 cats
run out of a place so fast.

00:16:21.735 --> 00:16:23.237
Hal, how could this
have happened?

00:16:23.278 --> 00:16:24.738
We've ruined Craig's life.

00:16:24.780 --> 00:16:26.657
No, no, it is not
our fault, Lois.

00:16:26.699 --> 00:16:28.409
At a certain point,
we simply have to say

00:16:28.450 --> 00:16:31.328
to ourselves that
Craig is just cursed.

00:16:31.370 --> 00:16:32.913
Dad, it's Jellybean!

00:16:32.913 --> 00:16:33.706
Oh, my God!

00:16:33.747 --> 00:16:35.040
Oh, my God.

00:16:35.082 --> 00:16:37.001
Let me just grind up one
of these sleeping pills.

00:16:37.042 --> 00:16:40.129
Won't take a minute.
Keep him entertained.

00:16:40.212 --> 00:16:42.923
Or we could just pick him up.

00:16:45.217 --> 00:16:46.885
Yay!

00:16:46.927 --> 00:16:50.389
You see, Dewey, I told you
everything would work out.

00:16:52.433 --> 00:16:55.144
You know,
it doesn't pay as well

00:16:55.227 --> 00:16:56.770
as some other summer jobs,

00:16:56.812 --> 00:16:59.231
but I get the chance
to mentor inner-city children.

00:16:59.273 --> 00:17:01.442
And how can you put
a price on smiles?

00:17:01.442 --> 00:17:04.319
Oh, you're cute  and  sweet.

00:17:04.403 --> 00:17:07.156
You know, this is the first time
I've gone out in six months.

00:17:07.239 --> 00:17:09.783
Then... we'll have to make this

00:17:09.825 --> 00:17:12.786
a night to remember, won't we?

00:17:17.374 --> 00:17:19.084
Amateurs.

00:17:19.126 --> 00:17:20.002
What?

00:17:20.044 --> 00:17:21.003
Oh, it's nothing.

00:17:21.045 --> 00:17:22.087
It's just a prank from...

00:17:22.129 --> 00:17:23.797
some of the kids
at the center.

00:17:23.839 --> 00:17:26.091
You know, it's inspiring
how they can laugh

00:17:26.133 --> 00:17:27.676
after all they've been through.

00:17:28.969 --> 00:17:31.055
Oh, man!

00:17:31.972 --> 00:17:33.015
I wasn't speeding, was I?

00:17:33.057 --> 00:17:35.100
I don't think so.

00:17:39.021 --> 00:17:40.314
License and
registration.

00:17:40.355 --> 00:17:41.315
Officer, what did I do?

00:17:41.356 --> 00:17:42.858
This car has been
reported stolen.

00:17:42.900 --> 00:17:44.193
License and
registration, please.

00:17:44.276 --> 00:17:47.821
Oh, it's been reported
stolen, huh?

00:17:53.702 --> 00:17:56.997
I'm not going to ask you again.
License and registration.

00:17:57.081 --> 00:18:00.000
Look, Officer,
I know this looks bad, but...

00:18:02.294 --> 00:18:03.462
Open the trunk, sir.

00:18:03.504 --> 00:18:04.838
Officer, let me explain...

00:18:04.838 --> 00:18:06.173
Open the trunk!

00:18:16.183 --> 00:18:19.061
Get out of the car!

00:18:21.814 --> 00:18:23.148
Mom wasn't too thrilled

00:18:23.190 --> 00:18:25.234
about having to pick us up
at the police station,

00:18:25.275 --> 00:18:26.735
but it was totally worth it.

00:18:26.777 --> 00:18:28.320
We don't have to serve
Francis anymore.

00:18:28.362 --> 00:18:29.822
Here's your sandwich, Craig.

00:18:29.863 --> 00:18:31.156
Can I go to bed now?

00:18:31.198 --> 00:18:33.659
Ooh, mayo on only one side?

00:18:33.700 --> 00:18:35.035
It's a lot of mayo.

00:18:35.077 --> 00:18:36.370
No one's saying it's not,

00:18:36.411 --> 00:18:38.372
but I specifically asked
for it on both sides.

00:18:38.413 --> 00:18:39.873
Craig...
Malcolm,

00:18:39.915 --> 00:18:41.667
I don't like this
any more than you do,

00:18:41.708 --> 00:18:43.377
but it was your mom's idea.

00:18:43.418 --> 00:18:46.004
Since as long as I'm living here
you have to do everything I say,

00:18:46.046 --> 00:18:48.382
I'll try to meet you
halfway and make my orders

00:18:48.423 --> 00:18:50.384
as clear as possible,
okay, champ?

00:18:50.384 --> 00:18:54.012
Here, I heated it for
ten seconds just like you said.

00:18:54.054 --> 00:18:56.890
It's still not quite
room temperature.

00:18:56.932 --> 00:18:59.393
Look, I know I'm
being demanding,

00:18:59.393 --> 00:19:03.063
but Jellybean's apartment
was burned down, too.

00:19:06.358 --> 00:19:08.152
All right,
it was  almost  worth it.

00:19:19.079 --> 00:19:21.707
There's something
you have to see.

00:19:26.253 --> 00:19:27.629
Cut.

00:19:34.094 --> 00:19:35.137
Cut.

00:19:36.263 --> 00:19:38.473
Ow!

00:19:41.185 --> 00:19:42.186
Cut.

00:19:44.646 --> 00:19:46.148
Shut up!
We wouldn't be in this mess

00:19:46.190 --> 00:19:47.524
if you hadn't called for help.

00:19:47.566 --> 00:19:49.693
Keep... pushing me...

00:19:49.693 --> 00:19:51.695
*.

00:19:53.113 --> 00:19:54.031
Would you guys stop laughing?

00:19:54.114 --> 00:19:55.532
Dang, it's not that funny.

00:19:55.532 --> 00:19:57.159
Craig, you can't
say "*."

00:19:57.201 --> 00:19:59.036
Keep...

00:19:59.119 --> 00:20:00.162
pushing me...

00:20:00.204 --> 00:20:02.039
*.

00:20:04.124 --> 00:20:05.042
Whoo!

00:20:10.214 --> 00:20:11.632
Cut! Cut!

00:20:11.673 --> 00:20:13.675
Now, honey, I'm sorry
you had to see that.