WEBVTT 00:01:00.965 --> 00:01:02.835 God. 00:01:17.666 --> 00:01:20.170 What the *? 00:02:11.005 --> 00:02:14.211 Help! Help! 00:02:14.278 --> 00:02:18.186 Help! Help! 00:02:18.253 --> 00:02:21.727 Help! Help! 00:02:21.793 --> 00:02:22.929 Help! 00:02:54.993 --> 00:02:56.429 Okay. 00:02:57.832 --> 00:02:59.903 Okay. 00:03:26.557 --> 00:03:28.159 Hello, Dr. Strauss. 00:03:28.226 --> 00:03:30.363 My name is Gene Bollinger. 00:03:30.430 --> 00:03:32.434 I was hoping to get started in a course 00:03:32.502 --> 00:03:33.904 of psychotherapy. 00:03:33.971 --> 00:03:35.908 I thought you might be able to help me 00:03:35.975 --> 00:03:37.410 with some of my problems. 00:03:38.113 --> 00:03:39.682 So, yeah. 00:03:39.749 --> 00:03:42.153 I guess I'll call you back, if that's okay. 00:03:42.220 --> 00:03:43.690 I'm a little hard to reach. 00:03:44.424 --> 00:03:46.863 Yeah, okay, thanks. 00:03:57.084 --> 00:03:59.856 Hi, it's Shoshana. Leave a message. 00:03:59.923 --> 00:04:02.060 Hey, honey. It's Dad. 00:04:02.127 --> 00:04:03.230 Just checking in. 00:04:03.296 --> 00:04:05.233 I'm in sessions until 8:00. 00:04:05.300 --> 00:04:06.970 Bye-bye. 00:04:13.517 --> 00:04:15.654 What can I help you with, Gene? 00:04:18.359 --> 00:04:20.831 My dad beat the shit out of me. 00:04:22.167 --> 00:04:24.906 A lot, when I was a kid. 00:04:26.308 --> 00:04:29.048 And I think it * me up. 00:04:29.816 --> 00:04:31.853 That's a tough thing to go through. 00:04:32.755 --> 00:04:34.926 You said it * you up. 00:04:34.993 --> 00:04:36.797 In what ways? 00:04:36.863 --> 00:04:38.801 All ways. 00:04:40.370 --> 00:04:41.674 Like I'm not content. 00:04:41.740 --> 00:04:44.445 I don't have a good social life. 00:04:44.513 --> 00:04:46.750 I get angry. 00:04:49.756 --> 00:04:53.029 That's the sort of thing you help people with, right? 00:04:53.998 --> 00:04:55.868 Yes. 00:04:56.636 --> 00:04:58.272 So, I read your book. 00:04:59.810 --> 00:05:01.913 -What'd you think? -It was good. 00:05:01.980 --> 00:05:06.022 I thought, you know, this guy is a real expert. 00:05:07.291 --> 00:05:08.961 Well, I've been doing it a long time. 00:05:18.848 --> 00:05:21.787 I'm sorry for your loss. 00:05:22.555 --> 00:05:24.258 That's what normal people say, right? 00:05:24.325 --> 00:05:27.331 How does it feel for you to say it? 00:05:27.397 --> 00:05:28.868 It just, um... 00:05:29.669 --> 00:05:32.207 ...just seems like what I hear people say. 00:05:32.274 --> 00:05:33.710 But I mean it. 00:05:33.777 --> 00:05:36.583 Well, that is the important part. 00:05:39.154 --> 00:05:40.424 Gene, I wanted to ask you 00:05:40.491 --> 00:05:42.060 about your sunglasses. 00:05:42.127 --> 00:05:44.231 I think it might be a good idea for you 00:05:44.298 --> 00:05:46.469 to take them off, so we can see each other better. 00:05:46.537 --> 00:05:47.538 I have eye problems. 00:05:47.605 --> 00:05:49.341 What's wrong? 00:05:49.408 --> 00:05:50.844 Light hurts them. 00:05:51.546 --> 00:05:53.182 They're oversensitive. 00:05:53.249 --> 00:05:55.220 You've seen a doctor about it? 00:05:55.287 --> 00:05:57.190 Two doctors. 00:06:06.577 --> 00:06:08.514 Well, we're out of time. 00:06:08.581 --> 00:06:10.484 Isn't that my line? 00:06:12.388 --> 00:06:15.160 I'm trying to take care of your needs again, aren't I? 00:06:15.227 --> 00:06:17.197 I think so. 00:06:22.942 --> 00:06:24.478 He hit me. 00:06:25.480 --> 00:06:27.117 All the time. 00:06:27.183 --> 00:06:28.987 When you say "all the time," 00:06:29.054 --> 00:06:32.428 could you be any more specific about it? 00:06:32.495 --> 00:06:34.431 Pretty much all the time. 00:07:55.528 --> 00:07:57.832 -Thank you. -Thank you very much. 00:07:57.898 --> 00:08:00.170 Alan, welcome. Chaim, how are you? 00:08:00.237 --> 00:08:01.271 Baruch Hashem. 00:08:01.338 --> 00:08:03.677 -You? -I'm well, thanks. 00:08:05.615 --> 00:08:07.017 I'll be in the back. 00:08:07.083 --> 00:08:08.654 Okay. 00:08:08.720 --> 00:08:11.225 -Hi, Ezra. -Hi, Dad. 00:08:12.361 --> 00:08:14.298 It's Mom's guitar? 00:08:15.568 --> 00:08:17.304 I figured you should have it. 00:08:17.371 --> 00:08:20.143 You're the only one in the family who plays, so... 00:08:23.650 --> 00:08:26.088 I don't play anymore. 00:08:28.961 --> 00:08:32.969 That's it, 'cause you'd expect anybody to save their own *, 00:08:33.036 --> 00:08:36.442 but he'd rather die than use her as his excuse, 00:08:36.509 --> 00:08:38.614 like, disgrace her. I think 00:08:38.681 --> 00:08:40.283 I have actually heard that one before. 00:08:40.349 --> 00:08:42.420 Right, it's a classic. 00:08:49.736 --> 00:08:51.540 You know, Gene, I've been thinking. 00:08:51.607 --> 00:08:53.343 It's been a while 00:08:53.410 --> 00:08:55.113 since we started talking together. 00:08:55.180 --> 00:08:58.119 And I've noticed that... 00:08:59.154 --> 00:09:03.597 ...you're not really opening yourself up to me. 00:09:03.664 --> 00:09:06.903 Whenever I ask for stories or details, 00:09:06.970 --> 00:09:09.909 you have a tendency to get kind of vague 00:09:09.976 --> 00:09:11.212 or you start telling me 00:09:11.279 --> 00:09:14.485 about country music songs that you like. 00:09:14.553 --> 00:09:19.061 And I've noticed that I myself am feeling 00:09:19.127 --> 00:09:21.734 a little frustrated by this process. 00:09:22.502 --> 00:09:25.139 And I'm wondering if you're feeling that as well. 00:09:26.175 --> 00:09:29.649 Usually when one person feels that way, it's kind of mutual. 00:09:32.254 --> 00:09:33.389 I don't know. 00:09:34.224 --> 00:09:37.966 I guess it's not working the way it did in your book. 00:09:38.032 --> 00:09:41.038 Gene, in order for this process to work, 00:09:41.105 --> 00:09:43.710 you have to be able to tell me things 00:09:43.777 --> 00:09:46.315 that are not easy to tell. 00:09:47.384 --> 00:09:50.991 To be open and truthful. 00:09:53.764 --> 00:09:55.801 Maybe I'm not cut out for this. 00:09:57.738 --> 00:10:00.911 'Cause I'm... I'm trying. 00:10:01.746 --> 00:10:04.251 I really... I'm trying. 00:10:05.988 --> 00:10:07.958 In my experience... 00:10:08.994 --> 00:10:10.397 ...anyone who has come this far, 00:10:10.463 --> 00:10:14.037 who has made the choice to come to therapy 00:10:14.104 --> 00:10:18.112 and keep hammering away at the hard things... 00:10:19.582 --> 00:10:21.218 ...they can be helped. 00:12:39.729 --> 00:12:42.467 I'm so sorry. I know this *s. 00:12:42.535 --> 00:12:44.070 I'll be right back. 00:12:58.934 --> 00:13:01.138 Gene, what the hell's going on? 00:13:01.205 --> 00:13:03.543 I mean, what the *?! 00:13:03.610 --> 00:13:06.281 Let me out, let me out, let me out of here. 00:13:06.348 --> 00:13:08.586 Let me out of here right now, Gene! 00:13:08.653 --> 00:13:11.191 -Gene! -You take it easy. 00:13:13.162 --> 00:13:15.099 Last night you were screaming. 00:13:15.166 --> 00:13:18.205 We're in the woods out here. Nobody's around. 00:13:22.715 --> 00:13:24.552 I know how upset you are. 00:13:24.618 --> 00:13:26.288 Of course. Anybody would be. 00:13:26.355 --> 00:13:28.526 This isn't as bad as it seems. 00:13:30.731 --> 00:13:34.605 It's bad, I know it's bad, but I just, I just need your help. 00:13:34.672 --> 00:13:35.741 Look... 00:13:36.743 --> 00:13:39.515 I don't know what you think you're doing, but this... 00:13:39.582 --> 00:13:40.984 this... 00:13:41.051 --> 00:13:42.922 Unlock this goddamn chain. 00:13:42.988 --> 00:13:45.126 Right now. I mean it, Gene. 00:13:46.062 --> 00:13:47.898 Gene, listen, you have to listen to me. 00:13:48.733 --> 00:13:50.436 I realize that there's something inside of you 00:13:50.504 --> 00:13:52.307 that's telling you that this is a good idea... 00:13:52.373 --> 00:13:54.812 I know, it's-it's not exactly that it's a good idea, 00:13:54.879 --> 00:13:56.081 I do realize that. 00:13:56.148 --> 00:13:58.085 But, you know, I'm out of options, 00:13:58.152 --> 00:14:00.256 and I really think if we can just talk, 00:14:00.323 --> 00:14:02.427 this will, this will be okay. 00:14:02.495 --> 00:14:04.498 -Okay-ish. -I have to help you see 00:14:04.565 --> 00:14:06.301 that this is wrong. 00:14:07.337 --> 00:14:08.974 Scaring me like this is wrong. 00:14:09.041 --> 00:14:10.944 You have to see that. I know you can see that. 00:14:11.011 --> 00:14:12.447 I do, I do, I know, 00:14:12.515 --> 00:14:16.957 but... I wasn't getting anywhere in therapy. 00:14:17.023 --> 00:14:19.128 You said so yourself, right? 00:14:19.194 --> 00:14:20.564 And I think that I know why. 00:14:20.631 --> 00:14:22.200 You see, I-I couldn't... 00:14:22.266 --> 00:14:24.939 I couldn't really tell you the truth in your office. 00:14:25.006 --> 00:14:26.743 But here, here... I can. 00:14:26.810 --> 00:14:28.146 No, no, no, no, no. 00:14:28.212 --> 00:14:29.882 This-this-this isn't good for either of us, Gene. 00:14:29.949 --> 00:14:33.824 We have to go back to my office and work through this together 00:14:33.891 --> 00:14:35.426 before this gets more out of hand. 00:14:35.494 --> 00:14:38.834 These are leftovers from Maruti, which is one of my favorites. 00:14:38.900 --> 00:14:40.637 It's surprisingly good for breakfast. 00:14:40.704 --> 00:14:42.207 This is chana palak. 00:14:42.274 --> 00:14:43.409 Put some of this on it. 00:14:43.475 --> 00:14:46.081 This is sabzi. It's good with this one. 00:14:46.147 --> 00:14:48.052 For God's sake, Gene, Gene! 00:14:48.119 --> 00:14:49.387 My name's... 00:14:50.791 --> 00:14:52.928 My name's actually Sam. 00:14:57.403 --> 00:14:58.573 Sorry. 00:15:01.813 --> 00:15:03.950 It's important to eat. 00:15:04.719 --> 00:15:06.556 I'm not gonna eat. 00:15:06.623 --> 00:15:08.358 Gene... Sam. 00:15:10.062 --> 00:15:12.467 You have to listen to me. 00:15:12.534 --> 00:15:13.603 I am listening. 00:15:13.670 --> 00:15:15.675 I am listening. I know how to listen. 00:15:15.741 --> 00:15:17.477 I understand... 00:15:18.246 --> 00:15:20.350 ...this is upsetting for you. 00:15:20.417 --> 00:15:21.184 I get that. 00:15:21.251 --> 00:15:23.389 It's a little scary, 00:15:23.455 --> 00:15:26.194 but this is the only way that I could... I... 00:15:27.631 --> 00:15:29.401 I need help. I want help. 00:15:29.468 --> 00:15:32.575 I'm asking you for, for help. 00:15:32.642 --> 00:15:34.879 You said therapy can't work if I'm not truthful. 00:15:34.946 --> 00:15:36.081 I know that you're right, so... 00:15:36.148 --> 00:15:37.918 No. No, you don't understand. 00:15:37.985 --> 00:15:40.524 I don't, I don't think you know what you're doing to me. 00:15:40.590 --> 00:15:42.394 I realize it might take you a little time 00:15:42.460 --> 00:15:43.663 to get used to what's happening here. 00:15:43.730 --> 00:15:45.166 Whatever is troubling you, 00:15:45.232 --> 00:15:47.538 we can address it, but not here. 00:15:47.605 --> 00:15:49.743 -Not like this. -Dr. Strauss, I have much bigger problems 00:15:49.809 --> 00:15:51.311 than your other patients. 00:15:53.115 --> 00:15:55.554 I have a compulsion... 00:15:57.324 --> 00:15:59.093 ...to kill people. 00:16:04.137 --> 00:16:06.007 A compulsion? 00:16:08.079 --> 00:16:09.548 Yeah, I do it. 00:16:15.561 --> 00:16:18.465 -Sam... -I don't mean just once or twice. 00:16:19.802 --> 00:16:22.006 Every once in a while I just... 00:16:22.874 --> 00:16:24.310 ...do it. 00:16:26.749 --> 00:16:28.820 And this has gone on ever since, 00:16:28.887 --> 00:16:31.659 for a long time. 00:16:32.426 --> 00:16:34.932 And I know I'm * up. 00:16:34.999 --> 00:16:36.970 I've read all the books, 00:16:37.036 --> 00:16:40.143 almost everything about, people like me, 00:16:40.210 --> 00:16:42.648 people who do this stuff, and I can't... 00:16:45.687 --> 00:16:47.157 I want to stop. 00:16:47.224 --> 00:16:49.929 And I'm trying so hard. 00:16:49.996 --> 00:16:51.532 I'm trying so hard right now, 00:16:51.599 --> 00:16:53.236 but there's this guy, there's this one guy, 00:16:53.302 --> 00:16:54.705 and I just want to... 00:16:54.772 --> 00:16:57.109 for months now... 00:16:57.978 --> 00:16:59.480 But I've not done it. 00:17:00.250 --> 00:17:01.586 'Cause I... 00:17:03.322 --> 00:17:04.626 Because I can't. 00:17:04.692 --> 00:17:05.694 Now, you, I wish you knew 00:17:05.761 --> 00:17:07.330 what it was like to live like this. 00:17:07.396 --> 00:17:09.101 It's not like what they say. 00:17:09.167 --> 00:17:10.738 Right? Where he's like a... 00:17:11.506 --> 00:17:13.476 Have you seen Silence of the Lambs? 00:17:13.544 --> 00:17:16.114 Where he's like a robot. 00:17:16.181 --> 00:17:17.618 It's not like that. 00:17:19.454 --> 00:17:20.189 Gene. 00:17:20.256 --> 00:17:23.228 -Sam. -Sam. 00:17:24.999 --> 00:17:26.569 Unlock this chain. 00:17:26.636 --> 00:17:29.140 I'm going to walk out of here and go back to my office. 00:17:29.207 --> 00:17:30.777 No, we already tried that. 00:17:30.844 --> 00:17:32.647 It didn't work without me telling you the truth. 00:17:32.714 --> 00:17:34.852 It will be different now that I know the truth. 00:17:34.919 --> 00:17:37.925 You will come to my office two, three days a week. 00:17:37.991 --> 00:17:39.996 I cannot help you like this. 00:17:40.062 --> 00:17:41.832 This is just going to make it worse. 00:17:42.768 --> 00:17:43.737 Let me go. 00:17:43.803 --> 00:17:45.172 I know you'd have to turn me in. 00:17:45.239 --> 00:17:48.478 No, no, no, no, no. I would not have to turn you in. 00:17:49.214 --> 00:17:50.818 Legally, ethically, 00:17:50.884 --> 00:17:53.656 unless you told me you were going to commit another crime, 00:17:53.723 --> 00:17:55.259 I can work with you. 00:17:55.325 --> 00:17:57.765 Everything you've told me so far is confidential. 00:17:57.831 --> 00:17:59.835 I am gonna commit another crime. 00:18:06.816 --> 00:18:08.920 I know I'm not normal. 00:18:08.987 --> 00:18:10.857 But I don't feel crazy. 00:18:11.826 --> 00:18:13.095 I'm not... 00:18:14.966 --> 00:18:17.437 I know this has to end, right? This has to stop. 00:18:17.504 --> 00:18:20.442 I just, I don't know how. 00:18:23.717 --> 00:18:25.185 This is not the way. 00:18:26.221 --> 00:18:27.591 Well... 00:18:28.325 --> 00:18:29.895 I'm sorry. 00:18:34.137 --> 00:18:35.874 Really, you're the best. 00:18:35.941 --> 00:18:39.280 I met with three different Jewish therapists. 00:18:40.316 --> 00:18:41.986 I chose you.