WEBVTT 00:00:10.160 --> 00:00:12.293 I suppose you want to close again tonight. 00:00:12.336 --> 00:00:14.469 I could really use the hours. 00:00:14.512 --> 00:00:16.471 I'm too good to you. 00:00:17.472 --> 00:00:21.084 Looks like I get to go home and watch Family Feud. 00:00:21.128 --> 00:00:23.869 That Steve Harvey really blows my skirt up. 00:00:26.133 --> 00:00:28.918 Your husband not working has been great for me. 00:00:28.961 --> 00:00:30.572 He is working. 00:00:30.615 --> 00:00:33.096 I mean, not working, working. He's bowling. 00:00:33.140 --> 00:00:36.012 Right. I think we're saying the same thing. 00:00:36.055 --> 00:00:37.187 Oh. 00:00:37.231 --> 00:00:38.493 When you sweep up the hair, 00:00:38.536 --> 00:00:41.626 I want you to pull out any long strands and shampoo them. 00:00:41.670 --> 00:00:44.020 I sell them to my cousin who makes dolls. 00:00:46.805 --> 00:00:48.590 Dad, 00:00:48.633 --> 00:00:50.983 my tap dance group is performing at the mall next week. 00:00:51.027 --> 00:00:54.161 I need you to sign this. 00:00:54.204 --> 00:00:56.598 You put me down to chaperone? 00:00:56.641 --> 00:00:58.208 Yeah. That just means you have to keep teenagers 00:00:58.252 --> 00:00:59.949 from throwing stuff at us. 00:00:59.992 --> 00:01:02.256 They're just jealous you get to wear a bow tie 00:01:02.299 --> 00:01:04.606 and do a kickline with three pretty girls. 00:01:05.998 --> 00:01:08.305 All right, go get ready for bed. 00:01:08.349 --> 00:01:10.786 I'm gonna wait up for your mom. I've barely seen her all week. 00:01:10.829 --> 00:01:12.788 Okay. Night, Dad. 00:01:12.831 --> 00:01:14.442 Good night. 00:01:14.485 --> 00:01:15.878 Play music. 00:01:37.465 --> 00:01:39.206 There's my queen. 00:01:40.859 --> 00:01:42.905 A beverage, milady? 00:01:58.964 --> 00:02:00.966 Thanks. Good night. 00:02:16.804 --> 00:02:19.028 Mom usually gives me baby carrots, 00:02:19.071 --> 00:02:20.551 not the big ones. 00:02:21.552 --> 00:02:24.555 Little piece of info, Sam. I'm about to blow your mind. 00:02:24.599 --> 00:02:26.557 Baby carrots aren't real. 00:02:26.601 --> 00:02:29.299 They're just big ones cut into little pieces by a machine. 00:02:29.343 --> 00:02:30.822 Yeah, right. 00:02:37.481 --> 00:02:38.656 Enjoy your babies. 00:02:40.528 --> 00:02:42.878 Aw, honey, I tried so hard 00:02:42.921 --> 00:02:44.445 to get home early last night to see you. 00:02:44.488 --> 00:02:45.881 - How was your test? - Fine. 00:02:45.924 --> 00:02:47.709 Okay. 00:02:47.752 --> 00:02:50.407 Morning. I'm gonna need you to mail these. 00:02:51.408 --> 00:02:54.716 Also, they'll need stamps. Uh, we're out of milk. 00:02:54.759 --> 00:02:56.326 The garage light is out. I'm gonna need you 00:02:56.370 --> 00:02:57.893 - to write this down. - Oh, no, I got it. 00:02:57.936 --> 00:02:59.503 I'll just picture myself licking a stamp 00:02:59.547 --> 00:03:01.940 while a light bulb shoots milk in my face. 00:03:03.420 --> 00:03:05.553 Okay. Sam, 00:03:05.596 --> 00:03:07.468 what else happened at school? I want to hear all about it. 00:03:07.511 --> 00:03:09.557 School. Stuff. You know. 00:03:09.600 --> 00:03:11.123 Oh, I got to grab my backpack. 00:03:11.167 --> 00:03:13.691 What? 00:03:13.735 --> 00:03:15.302 "School. Stuff. You know"? 00:03:15.345 --> 00:03:17.347 That's all I get? I used to get a full report. 00:03:17.391 --> 00:03:18.653 He gave me the whole lowdown. 00:03:18.696 --> 00:03:19.871 Maybe I could fill you in tonight. 00:03:19.915 --> 00:03:21.482 We could have dinner, dessert. 00:03:21.525 --> 00:03:23.658 I'll even watch Great British Bake Off with you. 00:03:23.701 --> 00:03:25.050 Every time a new character comes on-screen, 00:03:25.094 --> 00:03:26.356 I promise I won't go... 00:03:26.400 --> 00:03:28.271 "Hello, governor." 00:03:29.925 --> 00:03:32.144 Look, I have clients all day, and I'm closing again. 00:03:32.188 --> 00:03:33.537 Let's play it by ear? 00:03:33.581 --> 00:03:35.583 Yeah. I-I just miss you. 00:03:35.626 --> 00:03:37.454 I miss you, too. I miss Sam. I miss everything. 00:03:37.498 --> 00:03:39.413 But this is the way it is. 00:03:39.456 --> 00:03:41.589 Can't you just take a night off? My mom can watch Sam. 00:03:41.632 --> 00:03:43.286 He can learn how to gut a fish. 00:03:45.462 --> 00:03:47.682 No. Someone has to pay the bills, 00:03:47.725 --> 00:03:49.684 and right now, that person is me. 00:03:50.641 --> 00:03:53.209 And we're still good with that, right? I... 00:03:53.252 --> 00:03:54.689 Yeah. Course. 00:03:57.082 --> 00:03:59.302 Oh, great. Ruth is pissed. I got to go. 00:03:59.346 --> 00:04:00.477 Sam, I love you! 00:04:00.521 --> 00:04:02.784 Oh, we're out of baby carrots. 00:04:10.482 --> 00:04:12.881 Your game is off. What's up with you? 00:04:12.924 --> 00:04:15.666 It's this lane. It's not level. 00:04:15.710 --> 00:04:17.886 It's like rolling my ball down a 60-foot waffle. 00:04:20.018 --> 00:04:22.673 My lanes are smoother than Denzel eating chocolate mousse, 00:04:22.717 --> 00:04:24.109 and you know it. 00:04:25.372 --> 00:04:26.808 Something's up your craw. What is it? 00:04:26.851 --> 00:04:29.637 Nothing. Just having some problems at home. 00:04:29.680 --> 00:04:30.681 It's no big deal. 00:04:30.725 --> 00:04:32.030 Jen's just used to being 00:04:32.074 --> 00:04:33.554 the one that gets to pick up Sam. 00:04:33.597 --> 00:04:34.605 She helps him with his homework. 00:04:34.606 --> 00:04:36.905 They get all that quality time together. 00:04:36.948 --> 00:04:38.559 It's killing her that she doesn't get that. 00:04:38.602 --> 00:04:39.908 I'm trying to fill in, 00:04:39.951 --> 00:04:41.431 but I can't even cut his carrots right. 00:04:41.475 --> 00:04:42.998 Well, why don't you just buy the baby ones? 00:04:43.041 --> 00:04:44.913 Carl, gonna blow your mind, dude. 00:04:44.956 --> 00:04:47.089 There's no such thing as a baby carrot. 00:04:47.132 --> 00:04:49.178 They just take regular carrots, and they put it in a mach... 00:04:49.221 --> 00:04:50.440 Nobody believes me. 00:04:52.747 --> 00:04:55.532 Look, we got a tournament in a couple of weeks. 00:04:55.576 --> 00:04:57.621 If you get your head in the game, 00:04:57.665 --> 00:04:58.927 you could win some money. 00:04:58.970 --> 00:05:01.016 That'd give you both some breathing room. 00:05:01.059 --> 00:05:02.583 I want to do something for her now. 00:05:02.626 --> 00:05:04.498 That look on her face this morning 00:05:04.541 --> 00:05:05.847 when she left, it... 00:05:05.890 --> 00:05:07.414 It broke me. 00:05:07.457 --> 00:05:08.937 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up. 00:05:08.980 --> 00:05:10.982 Let's just... Let's just back up a bit. 00:05:11.026 --> 00:05:13.028 Um, what do you mean, 00:05:13.071 --> 00:05:15.291 there's no such thing as baby carrots? 00:05:16.988 --> 00:05:19.861 I've eaten them, so... 00:05:21.384 --> 00:05:24.039 There you go, Doreen. You're all set. 00:05:24.082 --> 00:05:25.432 Have fun at the funeral. 00:05:27.564 --> 00:05:28.783 "Have fun at the funeral"? 00:05:28.826 --> 00:05:31.525 I know. My brain is mush. 00:05:31.568 --> 00:05:34.310 And the craziest thing is she's not even going to a funeral. 00:05:35.920 --> 00:05:37.966 Well, I know what'll fix you right up. 00:05:38.009 --> 00:05:39.315 - Mm. - Margarita Mondays. 00:05:39.358 --> 00:05:41.230 First round's on me, girl. 00:05:41.273 --> 00:05:43.841 And I mean that literally. I plan on doing body shots. 00:05:44.842 --> 00:05:46.627 I wish I could, but... 00:05:46.670 --> 00:05:49.282 Margarita Mondays have turned into 00:05:49.326 --> 00:05:51.849 "chug a beer in my kitchen while I worry 00:05:51.893 --> 00:05:53.721 about paying my mortgage" Mondays. 00:05:53.764 --> 00:05:57.159 Maybe 'cause it's longer, but yours sounds way less fun. 00:05:57.202 --> 00:06:00.292 I know. It's just the way things have to be 00:06:00.336 --> 00:06:01.946 until Tom's career starts to take off. 00:06:01.990 --> 00:06:04.645 It was a wedding, not a funeral. 00:06:06.473 --> 00:06:07.909 It's okay. They're kind of close. 00:06:07.952 --> 00:06:09.519 Church. People crying. 00:06:09.563 --> 00:06:11.652 Everybody's *. 00:06:12.609 --> 00:06:15.656 All right. I will see you next month. 00:06:15.699 --> 00:06:17.875 It's just this whole thing 00:06:17.919 --> 00:06:19.398 is harder than I expected. 00:06:19.442 --> 00:06:21.749 By the time I get home, Sam's already in bed. 00:06:21.792 --> 00:06:23.185 I'm too tired to eat. 00:06:23.228 --> 00:06:24.578 I'm barking orders at Tom. 00:06:24.621 --> 00:06:27.363 I'm just not the wife or mother I want to be. 00:06:27.406 --> 00:06:29.974 I want to be Jessica Alba. 00:06:30.018 --> 00:06:32.194 Like, how does she make it look so easy? 00:06:32.237 --> 00:06:34.544 Well, I heard she has six nannies, 00:06:34.588 --> 00:06:35.850 two personal assistants, 00:06:35.893 --> 00:06:38.156 and she's three-quarters fembot. 00:06:39.549 --> 00:06:41.943 You already started drinking, didn't you? 00:06:41.986 --> 00:06:45.381 - I may have had a hard coffee. - Mm-hmm. 00:06:45.424 --> 00:06:47.949 Well, tonight is not gonna be as much fun without you. 00:06:47.992 --> 00:06:50.073 I'm sure you'll survive the ten minutes we spend together 00:06:50.117 --> 00:06:52.475 before you disappear with some random dude. 00:06:52.519 --> 00:06:54.042 Oh, that guy wasn't random. 00:06:54.085 --> 00:06:55.739 He used to be the principal at my high school. 00:06:58.263 --> 00:06:59.613 Oh. 00:06:59.656 --> 00:07:01.571 Oh. 00:07:02.616 --> 00:07:04.443 Take this turkey sandwich. 00:07:04.487 --> 00:07:07.229 It's got the perfect amount of meat, mayo, lettuce, 00:07:07.272 --> 00:07:09.405 just a thin slice of tomato. 00:07:09.448 --> 00:07:12.060 Thank you for seeing me. 00:07:14.149 --> 00:07:15.803 Our life was like this sandwich. 00:07:15.846 --> 00:07:17.152 It had a rhythm to it. 00:07:17.195 --> 00:07:18.501 Everybody knew the part they played. 00:07:18.545 --> 00:07:19.807 Now it's all mixed up. 00:07:19.850 --> 00:07:21.591 Turkey's working double shifts. 00:07:21.635 --> 00:07:22.984 She's missing the tomato, 00:07:23.027 --> 00:07:25.073 and the bread can't do anything about it. 00:07:25.116 --> 00:07:27.641 I was thinking with how pasty your skin is, 00:07:27.684 --> 00:07:29.077 you'd be the mayo. 00:07:30.426 --> 00:07:32.167 So, am I the turkey or the bread? 00:07:32.210 --> 00:07:34.561 Have you two never heard of a metaphor? 00:07:35.866 --> 00:07:37.999 I'm the tomato, right? 00:07:38.042 --> 00:07:40.001 No. Forget the sandwich. 00:07:40.044 --> 00:07:41.524 I just wish there was a way 00:07:41.568 --> 00:07:42.960 for me to bring in some extra cash, 00:07:43.004 --> 00:07:44.658 give Jen a day off 00:07:44.701 --> 00:07:47.748 so she can get a massage, have some quality time with Sam. 00:07:47.791 --> 00:07:49.706 - Maybe even have dinner with me. - Well, I mean, 00:07:49.750 --> 00:07:51.186 you got your baseball card collection. 00:07:51.229 --> 00:07:52.753 That's got to be worth something, right? 00:07:52.796 --> 00:07:54.755 I'll thank you to never say that again. 00:07:56.583 --> 00:07:58.019 Next idea, please. 00:07:59.586 --> 00:08:02.676 Clinical trials are a great way to make some quick cash. 00:08:02.719 --> 00:08:04.852 That's what I do. 00:08:04.895 --> 00:08:06.854 You mean scientific experiments? 00:08:06.897 --> 00:08:09.552 Don't those things have crazy side effects? 00:08:09.596 --> 00:08:13.338 Nothing serious. I mean, one time, my toenails fell off. 00:08:14.601 --> 00:08:16.907 Easiest hundred bucks I ever made. 00:08:17.908 --> 00:08:19.475 Thank you. 00:08:20.345 --> 00:08:21.695 I'll just keep that in my back pocket 00:08:21.738 --> 00:08:25.394 until anyone suggests literally anything else. 00:08:25.437 --> 00:08:28.397 Hey, there's always the old Hardwood Hustle. 00:08:28.440 --> 00:08:29.572 What the hell is that? 00:08:29.616 --> 00:08:31.139 When Tom was a kid, 00:08:31.182 --> 00:08:32.793 we used to hustle other bowlers out of money. 00:08:32.836 --> 00:08:35.491 - Fast way to make some cash. - Yeah. 00:08:35.534 --> 00:08:36.927 I don't wanna do anything shady. 00:08:36.971 --> 00:08:38.625 - I'm not doing that again. - You sure? 00:08:38.668 --> 00:08:40.235 'Cause there's a telemarketers convention 00:08:40.278 --> 00:08:42.019 that's rented out half the alley tonight. 00:08:42.063 --> 00:08:45.109 Those bastards spend their days ripping off old ladies. 00:08:45.153 --> 00:08:49.070 And even worse, calling me during my meditation! 00:08:49.113 --> 00:08:52.595 You know what, they are constantly calling me, too. 00:08:52.639 --> 00:08:55.293 Talking about I need to pay off my credit cards. 00:08:55.337 --> 00:08:57.731 Like, what? It's weird. 00:08:58.949 --> 00:09:00.690 Lew, those aren't telemarketers. 00:09:02.736 --> 00:09:05.260 Those are bill collectors. 00:09:05.303 --> 00:09:07.828 You need to pay every month. You pay a little bit. 00:09:07.871 --> 00:09:11.353 - I got to go. I got to get Sam. I'll be back later. - All right. 00:09:11.396 --> 00:09:12.528 But don't forget, 00:09:12.571 --> 00:09:13.790 you got a tournament coming up, 00:09:13.834 --> 00:09:15.618 and your game is all over the place. 00:09:15.662 --> 00:09:17.620 A little hustle just might get your juices flowing again. 00:09:17.664 --> 00:09:19.970 That was another side effect. 00:09:21.580 --> 00:09:24.018 Mimi, no one wants to hear about your juices. 00:09:24.975 --> 00:09:26.673 I'm listening. 00:09:30.981 --> 00:09:32.591 All right, Sam. 00:09:32.635 --> 00:09:34.637 If Mom can't be home, we'll bring home to her. 00:09:34.681 --> 00:09:36.770 Little treat. Couple good stories from you. 00:09:36.813 --> 00:09:37.806 Maybe she can help you solve 00:09:37.849 --> 00:09:39.773 that math problem with the letters in it. 00:09:39.816 --> 00:09:41.513 You said you knew the answer to that. 00:09:41.557 --> 00:09:43.690 I do. I just think she'd like to tell you. 00:09:43.733 --> 00:09:44.952 Mom! 00:09:44.995 --> 00:09:45.996 - Surprise! - What? 00:09:46.040 --> 00:09:47.041 Oh, my God! 00:09:47.084 --> 00:09:48.477 What are you doing here? 00:09:48.520 --> 00:09:49.652 You brought me Froyo? 00:09:49.696 --> 00:09:51.567 That's my favorite "yo." 00:09:52.524 --> 00:09:54.701 All your favorite toppings. We got gummy bear. 00:09:54.744 --> 00:09:56.267 - We got cookie dough. - Hey, Jen. 00:09:56.311 --> 00:09:57.878 - Your phone's buzzing. - Oh. Okay. 00:09:57.921 --> 00:10:00.054 I'll be right back. Don't cut anyone's hair. 00:10:01.403 --> 00:10:02.926 Hey, Sam, when Mom gets back, 00:10:02.970 --> 00:10:04.580 tell me that story you told me in the car. 00:10:04.623 --> 00:10:06.800 - I'll pretend I've never heard it. - Got it. 00:10:06.843 --> 00:10:08.236 Sorry. 00:10:08.279 --> 00:10:09.716 Sam was just gonna tell me 00:10:09.759 --> 00:10:11.326 something that happened in class today. 00:10:11.369 --> 00:10:13.067 - Okay. - Based on his excitement, it may top the day 00:10:13.110 --> 00:10:15.373 his health teacher threw up in the CPR dummy's mouth. 00:10:16.331 --> 00:10:18.986 Yes! A Sam story straight from the source. Go. 00:10:19.029 --> 00:10:20.857 So, Miss Hong was asking for volunteers... 00:10:20.901 --> 00:10:22.380 Jen? I'm here. 00:10:22.424 --> 00:10:24.861 Hey! Brenda. Uh, why don't you have a seat 00:10:24.905 --> 00:10:26.341 and get settled, and I'll be right over. 00:10:26.384 --> 00:10:27.908 Okay. 00:10:27.951 --> 00:10:29.997 - Continue. - Honey, is... is this a bad time? 00:10:30.040 --> 00:10:31.215 Yes, but I don't want you to go. 00:10:31.215 --> 00:10:33.043 Jen, your phone's buzzing again. 00:10:33.087 --> 00:10:35.698 - Honey, it's fine. - I'm in a little bit of a time crunch. 00:10:35.742 --> 00:10:37.004 - Do you want me to get it? - No. 00:10:37.047 --> 00:10:38.701 No, no, no. Uh, no, I got it. 00:10:38.745 --> 00:10:41.182 I'm sorry, guys. I got to go. 00:10:41.225 --> 00:10:43.358 But I love that you came by. Here. 00:10:43.401 --> 00:10:44.446 Feel free 00:10:44.489 --> 00:10:46.840 to eat my yo if it's still fro. 00:10:53.804 --> 00:10:56.512 How much would you give me for this 1965 rookie card? 00:10:56.755 --> 00:10:58.540 Keeping in mind he's a Hall of Famer 00:10:58.583 --> 00:11:01.673 and only three people have ever touched this card. 00:11:01.717 --> 00:11:03.371 Four. 00:11:04.676 --> 00:11:08.158 Actually, sorry. Hold it gently, loosely by the edges. 00:11:08.201 --> 00:11:09.377 Like that. 00:11:09.420 --> 00:11:11.204 No, looselier. 00:11:11.248 --> 00:11:12.510 Looselier. I'm... 00:11:14.033 --> 00:11:15.687 You know what, I'm actually gonna hold on to this one. 00:11:18.037 --> 00:11:20.039 And this one. 00:11:21.040 --> 00:11:22.912 Also this one. 00:11:22.955 --> 00:11:24.653 Wow. 00:11:24.696 --> 00:11:26.481 This was a huge waste of your time. 00:11:26.524 --> 00:11:29.309 All right. Hardwood Hustle it is. 00:11:29.353 --> 00:11:32.225 Great. We're gonna take those fools down. 00:11:33.183 --> 00:11:36.404 That'll teach them to sell a guy hair pills that don't work. 00:11:43.019 --> 00:11:44.847 - Sizes? - 11. 00:11:44.890 --> 00:11:45.978 Nine. 00:11:46.022 --> 00:11:48.285 So, I called the old lady back. 00:11:48.328 --> 00:11:50.896 - You sold her a second reverse mortgage? - Damn right. 00:11:50.940 --> 00:11:53.595 Plus a warranty to her car, and I don't even do those. 00:11:56.772 --> 00:11:58.730 All right, gentlemen. Have fun. 00:12:00.471 --> 00:12:03.082 Mm-hmm. While you still alive, 00:12:03.126 --> 00:12:06.346 'cause you gonna be smoking turds in hell. 00:12:07.347 --> 00:12:09.611 Um, Sam, 00:12:09.654 --> 00:12:11.787 here's five bucks, pal. Um, go play video games, okay? 00:12:11.830 --> 00:12:12.962 Nice. 00:12:15.573 --> 00:12:17.140 All right. I'm going in. 00:12:17.183 --> 00:12:18.881 All right, so, how we gonna play these chumps? 00:12:18.924 --> 00:12:20.491 Rock the Baby? Skin the Goat? 00:12:20.535 --> 00:12:22.537 Oh, Karaoke Night in Taiwan? 00:12:24.364 --> 00:12:27.019 Does this look like Taiwan, dummy? 00:12:28.673 --> 00:12:30.545 We're doing a classic Hardwood Hustle, 00:12:30.588 --> 00:12:32.155 same as when Tom was a kid. 00:12:32.198 --> 00:12:34.418 You throw the first game. You ask for another chance. 00:12:34.462 --> 00:12:37.813 You double the bet, and then ba-ba-bam. 00:12:38.770 --> 00:12:40.468 Okay. 00:12:40.511 --> 00:12:42.295 I'm going in. Do I look like a *er? 00:12:42.339 --> 00:12:43.514 You always look like a * 00:12:44.559 --> 00:12:46.604 You have cheese in your beard. 00:12:51.827 --> 00:12:53.263 Howdy, fellas. 00:12:53.306 --> 00:12:54.917 Hope I don't disturb you if I play over here. 00:12:54.960 --> 00:12:56.527 It's been a few years since I bowled. 00:12:56.571 --> 00:13:00.618 Boy, that lane sure is long. 00:13:02.141 --> 00:13:05.623 Ugh. That act was a lot cuter when he was 11. 00:13:06.972 --> 00:13:09.845 All right, Cinderella. 00:13:09.907 --> 00:13:11.256 In that skirt, I don't think 00:13:11.300 --> 00:13:12.431 anyone's gonna notice you have ears. 00:13:13.998 --> 00:13:16.044 Okay. Have fun. Be safe. 00:13:16.087 --> 00:13:17.872 Do not settle for a guy with a futon. 00:13:17.915 --> 00:13:20.918 You deserve a bed that's never a couch. 00:13:21.919 --> 00:13:23.312 Thanks, Mom. 00:13:25.096 --> 00:13:27.055 Least I can be a mom to someone today. 00:13:27.098 --> 00:13:28.796 What are you talking about? 00:13:28.839 --> 00:13:30.493 You were a great mom all day today. 00:13:30.536 --> 00:13:32.321 How? I wasn't home. 00:13:32.364 --> 00:13:34.758 I-I couldn't even take a Froyo break with them. 00:13:34.802 --> 00:13:37.065 That's right. Because you were working your * off 00:13:37.108 --> 00:13:38.457 and showing Sam you'll do anything 00:13:38.501 --> 00:13:39.720 to provide for your family 00:13:39.763 --> 00:13:41.460 while your husband chases his dream. 00:13:41.504 --> 00:13:43.288 - Yeah? - Hell yeah. 00:13:43.332 --> 00:13:46.814 I would take that bad* mom over robot Jessica Alba any day. 00:13:48.772 --> 00:13:51.122 Do you ever notice that her eyes don't move? 00:13:51.166 --> 00:13:52.558 It's like... 00:13:55.736 --> 00:13:57.607 Thanks. 00:13:59.478 --> 00:14:01.698 You know, I got to stop feeling sorry for myself 00:14:01.742 --> 00:14:03.874 and-and be in acceptance. 00:14:03.918 --> 00:14:06.442 Like, this is my new life now, and we're gonna be okay. 00:14:06.485 --> 00:14:10.446 - And I just need to start focusing on all the... - Ooh. I got to go. 00:14:10.489 --> 00:14:12.230 I think my gummy just kicked in. 00:14:19.673 --> 00:14:21.457 Well, 00:14:21.500 --> 00:14:22.980 here goes nothing. 00:14:23.024 --> 00:14:25.113 How many pins do I need to catch up to you guys? 00:14:25.156 --> 00:14:27.115 - 36. - And you have ten left. 00:14:27.158 --> 00:14:28.551 Ooh! Wow. 00:14:28.594 --> 00:14:31.293 That seems impossible. 00:14:32.990 --> 00:14:34.644 You only lose when you don't try. 00:14:34.688 --> 00:14:37.125 - That's very deep, Brad. - I'm Ben. 00:14:37.168 --> 00:14:38.866 There you go being deep again, Brad. 00:14:41.433 --> 00:14:43.653 Now comes the ba-bam. 00:14:43.697 --> 00:14:45.873 I really feel like I started to hit my groove 00:14:45.916 --> 00:14:46.961 towards the end there. 00:14:47.004 --> 00:14:48.789 Guess it just wasn't your day. 00:14:48.832 --> 00:14:50.399 I-I'm open to playing again. 00:14:50.442 --> 00:14:52.140 I'd even be willing to double the bet. 00:14:52.183 --> 00:14:53.358 What do... What do you say? 00:14:54.359 --> 00:14:55.709 I'm good. 00:14:58.363 --> 00:14:59.538 What? 00:14:59.582 --> 00:15:01.062 I sell reverse mortgages. 00:15:01.105 --> 00:15:02.628 Do you really think you're gonna hustle me? 00:15:11.725 --> 00:15:13.465 What the hell just happened? 00:15:13.509 --> 00:15:16.555 I think you just got Karaoke'd in Taiwan. 00:15:17.905 --> 00:15:21.038 Or, as they say... 00:15:23.780 --> 00:15:25.913 "The teacher has been taught." 00:15:27.436 --> 00:15:30.787 What? I'm taking night classes. Let me grow. 00:15:35.836 --> 00:15:37.141 - Hey. - Hey. 00:15:37.185 --> 00:15:40.275 Um, can I talk to you for a second? 00:15:40.318 --> 00:15:42.407 I-I know you're tired. 00:15:43.844 --> 00:15:46.498 Not that you look tired. You look great. 00:15:46.542 --> 00:15:48.544 Fresh. Like the day I met you. 00:15:48.587 --> 00:15:49.937 Okay. Honey. 00:15:50.894 --> 00:15:52.504 Radiant? 00:15:53.854 --> 00:15:55.203 I... Look, I just... 00:15:55.246 --> 00:15:56.508 I know it's a tough time right now, 00:15:56.552 --> 00:15:57.988 and the burden's all on you. 00:15:58.032 --> 00:16:00.948 So I-I wanted to do something to give you a break. 00:16:04.647 --> 00:16:05.996 Ba-bam. 00:16:08.869 --> 00:16:11.306 - But where did this come from? - I had an interesting day. 00:16:11.349 --> 00:16:12.786 I won a couple hundred bucks off a guy 00:16:12.829 --> 00:16:14.657 doing the Hardwood Hustle. 00:16:14.700 --> 00:16:17.181 It didn't go well at first. I actually lost money. 00:16:17.225 --> 00:16:18.748 Okay. 00:16:18.792 --> 00:16:20.315 But then I found this other guy. 00:16:20.358 --> 00:16:22.752 Guess I just got lucky. 00:16:22.796 --> 00:16:26.103 You say the 7-10 split is difficult to pick up? 00:16:31.108 --> 00:16:33.937 So you conned a guy out of his money? 00:16:33.981 --> 00:16:35.504 I'm a smooth operator. 00:16:37.462 --> 00:16:39.856 And it worked perfectly until... 00:16:50.432 --> 00:16:52.477 I couldn't do it. 00:16:52.521 --> 00:16:54.131 I'm a dad now. 00:16:54.175 --> 00:16:56.612 That doesn't set a good example for Sam. 00:16:56.655 --> 00:16:59.093 So I gave the money back. 00:16:59.136 --> 00:17:01.138 So where did this money come from? 00:17:02.139 --> 00:17:04.272 I sold my baseball card collection. 00:17:04.315 --> 00:17:07.405 What? Babe, come on. You love that collection. 00:17:08.406 --> 00:17:10.147 I love you more. 00:17:10.191 --> 00:17:11.888 It was a no-brainer. 00:17:13.629 --> 00:17:15.631 Give them a good home. 00:17:15.674 --> 00:17:16.937 Actually, maybe... 00:17:16.980 --> 00:17:18.634 Maybe I could just say goodbye. 00:17:18.677 --> 00:17:21.593 Just a little... Just five more minutes, maybe? 00:17:23.160 --> 00:17:25.859 I'm having a bit of seller's remorse. 00:17:27.077 --> 00:17:31.255 Is this money gonna solve all of our problems? No. 00:17:31.299 --> 00:17:34.128 Can you quit your job? Nope. 00:17:35.738 --> 00:17:37.566 Not even close. 00:17:38.915 --> 00:17:40.264 But can you take a couple of days off? 00:17:40.308 --> 00:17:41.744 You're damn right. 00:17:41.787 --> 00:17:43.702 And the first day, you get to chaperone 00:17:43.746 --> 00:17:46.053 Sam and his tap dance troupe to the mall, 00:17:46.096 --> 00:17:48.055 and you'll get to tell me all about it. 00:17:48.098 --> 00:17:51.667 The day after that, get to spend the afternoon at the spa 00:17:51.710 --> 00:17:53.582 for some much deserved relaxation and pampering. 00:17:53.625 --> 00:17:57.847 Followed by pizza and wings. Maybe even that dessert. 00:17:57.891 --> 00:17:59.805 You can tell it's just pizza dough with sugar on it, 00:17:59.849 --> 00:18:01.242 but it's still pretty good. 00:18:02.939 --> 00:18:06.247 I don't know. It-it depends on how much cash we have left. 00:18:07.901 --> 00:18:08.902 Is that not good? 00:18:10.555 --> 00:18:12.253 It's better than good. 00:18:13.123 --> 00:18:16.039 You're always better than good. 00:18:16.083 --> 00:18:17.911 All those years, 00:18:17.954 --> 00:18:20.565 you worked a job you didn't love to keep a roof over our head. 00:18:20.609 --> 00:18:22.132 You missed 00:18:22.176 --> 00:18:24.613 so many things with Sam, and you never said a word. 00:18:24.656 --> 00:18:26.049 You never made me feel bad about it. 00:18:26.093 --> 00:18:28.443 Now it's my turn. 00:18:29.400 --> 00:18:30.924 I love you. 00:18:37.430 --> 00:18:39.737 Okay. 00:18:40.380 --> 00:18:43.340 Girl products smell different from boy products. 00:18:43.383 --> 00:18:45.908 Boy products are all tobacco and leather. 00:18:45.951 --> 00:18:48.345 It smells like a leprechaun baby shower in here. 00:18:50.782 --> 00:18:52.871 Cute, right? 00:18:52.915 --> 00:18:55.613 You are helping me close 00:18:55.657 --> 00:18:56.832 to spend time together. 00:18:56.875 --> 00:18:58.877 Anything you say is cute. 00:19:01.814 --> 00:19:03.772 Oops. Sorry. 00:19:03.816 --> 00:19:05.078 You guys can have this room. 00:19:05.121 --> 00:19:06.732 We'll just take the chair by the sink.