WEBVTT 00:00:10.291 --> 00:00:12.416 Talus. Metatarsal. 00:00:14.083 --> 00:00:16.750 - Phalange. - Good. 00:00:17.083 --> 00:00:18.166 The hand. 00:00:18.833 --> 00:00:21.666 Scaphoid, trapezium. 00:00:23.041 --> 00:00:26.541 - Revise later. - Difficult thoughts help me concentrate. 00:00:29.916 --> 00:00:31.166 Actually, 00:00:31.208 --> 00:00:33.875 I need to tell you something personal. 00:00:35.458 --> 00:00:36.583 I've met someone. 00:00:38.875 --> 00:00:40.250 OK. Does he have prospects? 00:00:42.666 --> 00:00:43.666 I see. 00:00:44.291 --> 00:00:45.500 What do you think? 00:00:45.541 --> 00:00:47.916 The mother. Always hard to find a good dentist. 00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:49.791 Dad, you're annoying. 00:00:50.916 --> 00:00:52.041 Are you happy? 00:00:53.500 --> 00:00:56.041 - Very. - Then so am I. 00:00:56.916 --> 00:00:57.666 Do you think Mum'll be OK with it? 00:00:57.708 --> 00:00:59.458 - Yeah, of course she'll be OK... - Shit! 00:01:06.791 --> 00:01:09.208 - Are you OK? - Yeah. 00:01:09.250 --> 00:01:11.958 Take a breath. Take a breath. I've got you. I've got you. 00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.166 Go for it again. 00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:21.000 Here we go. 00:01:22.041 --> 00:01:23.583 Well done, well done. 00:01:38.583 --> 00:01:40.791 Can we not tell Mum? 00:01:40.833 --> 00:01:43.000 What about? The fall or the girlfriend? 00:01:44.750 --> 00:01:46.333 Both. 00:01:54.750 --> 00:01:57.000 She's stressed at the moment. 00:01:57.083 --> 00:01:59.166 Yeah, OK, we've all got problems. 00:01:59.708 --> 00:02:02.500 Yeah, we've all got problems. That's right, mate. 00:02:02.541 --> 00:02:05.666 We do, but all I'm asking you is that when you get home tonight... 00:02:06.416 --> 00:02:07.958 just take it easy with Mum, yeah? 00:02:08.041 --> 00:02:10.166 - Why? - She's having trouble at work. 00:02:10.208 --> 00:02:13.166 - What sort of trouble? - She's trying to pass this exam 00:02:13.208 --> 00:02:16.125 and one of the supervisors isn't... 00:02:16.208 --> 00:02:18.875 Look, I don't know exactly what it is, mate, 00:02:18.916 --> 00:02:22.041 but you know what I'm saying. Be kind. Be nice. 00:02:22.125 --> 00:02:24.500 - Yeah, OK. - And smile. I know you can. 00:02:24.541 --> 00:02:25.958 Do my best. 00:02:26.041 --> 00:02:28.500 Just smile. 00:02:28.541 --> 00:02:30.791 - Yeah. - OK. Thanks, mate. 00:02:30.833 --> 00:02:32.125 All right, Dad. See you. 00:02:32.208 --> 00:02:34.000 I'll see you later. Bye. 00:02:35.375 --> 00:02:37.375 Well, let's get going. 00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:52.458 - You all right, Tony? Feeling better? - Yes, mate. 00:02:52.500 --> 00:02:54.500 Good, good. 00:03:07.333 --> 00:03:10.666 - Hot today. - Mexico sent it up the Gulf Stream apparently. 00:03:12.958 --> 00:03:14.958 How's the family? 00:03:16.541 --> 00:03:17.916 What's the bad news? 00:03:17.958 --> 00:03:19.958 What? Nothing. 00:03:20.041 --> 00:03:21.708 I'm not gonna like this, am I? 00:03:22.625 --> 00:03:25.916 - How are the kids, though? - The kids are beautiful. 00:03:25.958 --> 00:03:28.958 Now why don't you tell me what I don't want to know. 00:03:30.250 --> 00:03:35.125 They're going to cut your level of management: Give half to me, half to team leaders. 00:03:35.916 --> 00:03:38.458 - They don't think they can justify... - So promote me. 00:03:38.500 --> 00:03:40.750 You can tell from my tone that's not what this is. 00:03:40.791 --> 00:03:44.041 - I've got three kids, mate. - That's why I asked how they were. 00:03:44.125 --> 00:03:47.208 So if one of them had leukaemia, would that make any difference? 00:03:48.166 --> 00:03:50.458 You'll be told officially in the next few days 00:03:50.500 --> 00:03:53.208 - but I wanted to give you... - Yeah, yeah. 00:03:53.250 --> 00:03:56.666 Month's notice, but I thought you might want to start looking. 00:03:58.083 --> 00:04:00.083 Sorry. 00:04:01.583 --> 00:04:03.291 It's not your fault. 00:04:04.250 --> 00:04:06.166 - Drink? - What? 00:04:06.208 --> 00:04:08.500 I could really do with a drink. 00:04:20.875 --> 00:04:23.333 - Happy birthday, Dad. - Happy birthday, darling. 00:04:23.333 --> 00:04:24.625 Thank you. 00:04:24.666 --> 00:04:26.333 - Plates. Two secs! - Yes! 00:04:26.375 --> 00:04:27.208 I'll help. 00:04:28.958 --> 00:04:30.416 Do you remember my 30th? 00:04:30.500 --> 00:04:31.625 We don't need to talk about that! 00:04:31.666 --> 00:04:34.416 - What happened? - He er... he came over with Lisa. 00:04:34.416 --> 00:04:35.000 No! 00:05:34.375 --> 00:05:37.333 Right, er... Sorry. Something happened at work. 00:05:37.375 --> 00:05:39.125 It's not good. I... 00:05:40.500 --> 00:05:42.416 - What's the matter? - Alex isn't home. 00:05:43.541 --> 00:05:45.916 I've tried his mobile. Jack. Everyone. 00:05:45.958 --> 00:05:47.416 No one knows where he is. 00:05:48.833 --> 00:05:51.041 - Are you on call? - Er, no. 00:05:56.083 --> 00:05:58.083 Hello? 00:06:02.291 --> 00:06:03.875 Right, well, I, er... 00:06:06.625 --> 00:06:09.083 Yeah. No. Of course. Of course. I'm on my way. 00:06:25.875 --> 00:06:27.833 - Thanks for coming in. - No problem. 00:06:27.875 --> 00:06:29.666 - You missed us. - Couldn't stay away. 00:06:29.708 --> 00:06:32.541 It's not your night, but Mr Franks is stuck in another code red. 00:06:32.625 --> 00:06:35.000 - Honestly, it's fine. - Been rushed off our feet tonight. 00:06:35.041 --> 00:06:38.208 I lost track earlier. Introduced myself twice to the same person! 00:06:38.250 --> 00:06:41.250 - Nora's drank too much coffee. - I'm fine. A few cups. 00:06:41.291 --> 00:06:42.708 - Seven. - Wow! 00:06:42.750 --> 00:06:44.666 One was a decaf. 00:06:44.708 --> 00:06:46.958 - Gentlemen. Good evening. - Evening. 00:06:47.916 --> 00:06:51.291 - Sam, how are the shoes? - The shoes are not for work. 00:06:52.916 --> 00:06:55.000 Guess how much he spent on a pair of shoes. 00:06:55.041 --> 00:06:56.916 - My brother's wedding. - A thousand. 00:06:56.958 --> 00:06:59.833 What? Where do you get that kind of money? 00:06:59.875 --> 00:07:02.750 Don't eat, don't do drugs, no kids. 00:07:02.791 --> 00:07:05.375 - I save. - Everyone good? 00:07:05.416 --> 00:07:07.416 - Ready. - All ready. 00:07:13.708 --> 00:07:14.916 This is Alex Bowker. 00:07:14.958 --> 00:07:18.375 Small puncture site, minimal bleeding. 00:07:18.416 --> 00:07:20.416 - Confused but conscious. - Thank you. 00:07:20.458 --> 00:07:22.916 Don't worry, Alex, we're going to look after you. 00:07:39.333 --> 00:07:41.208 - Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. - Oi. 00:07:41.250 --> 00:07:44.250 - Sorry. My... my... my son. - Sir, can you wait a moment, please? 00:07:44.291 --> 00:07:46.083 - I'm not going to queue. - Can I help? 00:07:46.125 --> 00:07:48.750 Yeah, my son. Erm... I rang his mobile. 00:07:48.791 --> 00:07:51.750 The police answered and said he was in hospital here. 00:07:51.791 --> 00:07:54.250 - They told me to go home and wait... - What's your son's name? 00:07:54.291 --> 00:07:56.291 - Alex. Alex Bowker. - OK. 00:08:03.250 --> 00:08:05.291 Alex? 00:08:05.333 --> 00:08:07.666 Jesus. 00:08:07.708 --> 00:08:09.000 Hey. Hello, mate. 00:08:09.083 --> 00:08:11.833 Hello. You're gonna be all right. You're gonna be fine. I promise. 00:08:11.875 --> 00:08:14.375 - Mr Bowker? - Yeah. Who... who... 00:08:14.416 --> 00:08:17.166 - Who...? - Mr Allerton, senior trauma surgeon here. 00:08:17.208 --> 00:08:20.708 - Is he all right? They said a stabbing. - Yes, he's been stabbed on the left side. 00:08:20.750 --> 00:08:24.291 Just under the ribs. But the ultrasound didn't show any sign of internal bleeding. 00:08:24.333 --> 00:08:26.000 - So that's reassuring. - Is he... 00:08:26.083 --> 00:08:29.875 We're going to take him for a full scan just to be sure. But, Mr Bowker? Mr Bowker? 00:08:29.916 --> 00:08:32.875 The trauma centre is the most wellresourced part of the hospital. 00:08:32.916 --> 00:08:35.333 Given what's happened, he couldn't be in a better place. 00:08:35.375 --> 00:08:38.166 - Should I be... - He's disorientated as you would expect. 00:08:38.208 --> 00:08:41.958 But medically, he's doing very well. If you'll just give me five minutes, 00:08:42.041 --> 00:08:44.250 - I will come back and update you. - Can I go with him? 00:08:44.291 --> 00:08:47.166 We'll look after him. Trust us. 00:08:49.250 --> 00:08:51.083 Please. 00:08:52.708 --> 00:08:54.833 - Jon? - Yeah? 00:08:54.875 --> 00:08:56.875 Sorry, I need you to sign that again. 00:09:00.333 --> 00:09:01.750 I know. I know. 00:09:13.708 --> 00:09:16.291 What's happened? Did you speak to the doctor? 00:09:16.333 --> 00:09:18.500 - Sorry, I was at the pub. - What? You... 00:09:18.541 --> 00:09:21.083 - It doesn't matter. Dan, the doctor. - Is your mum all right? 00:09:21.125 --> 00:09:23.125 Worried. Is he... is he all right? Where is he? 00:09:23.166 --> 00:09:25.416 He's... I've seen him. He's OK, he's OK. 00:09:25.458 --> 00:09:28.958 His eyes were open. Er, then, yeah, the doctor said he'd been stabbed. 00:09:29.041 --> 00:09:31.000 - My God. - In his side, I think. 00:09:31.083 --> 00:09:34.333 But, er... Why...? Who would... 00:09:34.375 --> 00:09:37.833 He's not like that. He... he doesn't mix with people who'd... 00:09:37.875 --> 00:09:40.291 The doctor said he'd be here in five minutes. It's been ten. 00:09:40.333 --> 00:09:41.875 Yes, yes? 00:09:41.916 --> 00:09:44.791 Mr Bowker. I'm DS Carl Harris, this is 00:09:44.791 --> 00:09:46.166 DC Lancing. Can we have a word, please? 00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:49.875 - Mr Bowker... - Look, Dan. My name's Dan. 00:09:49.958 --> 00:09:52.250 Thank you. Do you mind if we ask you a few questions? 00:09:52.291 --> 00:09:56.416 - The doctor's supposed to be coming any... - Of course. If the doctor comes we'll leave. 00:09:57.791 --> 00:10:00.875 Can you think of any reason anyone might want to do this to Alex? 00:10:01.333 --> 00:10:04.250 - No. - He's popular. He's got friends. 00:10:04.291 --> 00:10:07.041 - Was Alex taking or dealing drugs at all? - No. 00:10:07.125 --> 00:10:09.791 Has he been involved in any groups of gangs that you know of? 00:10:09.833 --> 00:10:12.250 No. He's not like that. 00:10:12.291 --> 00:10:16.333 Obviously, he was out quite late. Were you aware of where he was? 00:10:16.375 --> 00:10:19.291 No. Erm... We were... we were worried. 00:10:19.333 --> 00:10:21.583 We couldn't get through on his phone. Er... 00:10:21.625 --> 00:10:24.000 - His mates, his friends were at home. - Where is he? 00:10:24.083 --> 00:10:26.041 - Sorry? - He said he'd be five minutes. 00:10:26.125 --> 00:10:28.666 - It's been almost 15. - I'm sure if he said he'd update you... 00:10:28.708 --> 00:10:31.666 He's probably told you more than he's told us, been more honest with you. 00:10:31.708 --> 00:10:33.708 - I can see if there's any... - He's on his own. 00:10:33.750 --> 00:10:36.875 - What? - Alex. He's going through all this on his own. 00:10:36.916 --> 00:10:40.083 - We should be with him. - Mr Bowker, if you'll... 00:11:05.291 --> 00:11:06.875 Suction, please, Nurse. 00:11:18.750 --> 00:11:20.666 - Charging. - Charged. 00:11:20.708 --> 00:11:22.208 Clear. 00:11:22.791 --> 00:11:25.125 - He's still in VF. - OK. 00:11:25.833 --> 00:11:27.833 I need more blood. 00:11:35.250 --> 00:11:37.375 Alex. Is that Alex? 00:11:37.416 --> 00:11:39.666 Could someone please help this boy's dad? 00:11:39.708 --> 00:11:41.791 You need to tell me what's happening! 00:11:42.083 --> 00:11:44.083 What's going on? Is he going to be all right? 00:11:46.708 --> 00:11:49.500 - Is he going to be all right? - Yes, if we can focus. More blood. 00:11:49.541 --> 00:11:51.458 We have to put him first. Mr Bowker, 00:11:51.500 --> 00:11:55.333 the best you could do right now would be to step away and let us do this. 00:11:55.375 --> 00:11:56.375 He's still in VF, Jon. 00:12:02.000 --> 00:12:03.708 - Jon? - Shock him again. 00:12:06.583 --> 00:12:08.333 Paddles, please. 00:12:09.125 --> 00:12:10.375 - Charging. - Charged. 00:12:10.416 --> 00:12:11.541 Clear. 00:12:11.583 --> 00:12:12.875 Come on, come on! 00:12:15.125 --> 00:12:16.541 He's in asystole now. 00:12:21.583 --> 00:12:23.583 Jon. 00:12:26.208 --> 00:12:28.208 Jon. 00:12:37.750 --> 00:12:39.750 12:54, please. 00:12:55.833 --> 00:12:57.833 - You want me to... - No, no, no. 00:12:58.750 --> 00:13:01.958 It's all right, erm... I'll do it. 00:13:17.250 --> 00:13:20.500 Erm... Can we, er... go into a side room? 00:13:22.500 --> 00:13:25.208 You can tell us here. That was him. 00:13:26.125 --> 00:13:27.833 Er, yes. 00:13:28.708 --> 00:13:30.708 Can I see him? 00:13:31.875 --> 00:13:34.875 I'm afraid we did everything we could, but Alex died. 00:13:34.916 --> 00:13:36.875 God. 00:13:36.916 --> 00:13:39.208 - I'm sorry. - I want to go and see him! 00:13:39.250 --> 00:13:41.458 - I'm very sorry. Can... - Let me see him. 00:13:41.500 --> 00:13:43.375 Please... Side room. 00:13:43.416 --> 00:13:45.916 Dan! Dan... 00:13:51.708 --> 00:13:53.708 Erm, Mr Bowker... 00:13:55.583 --> 00:13:58.166 Would you step this way? 00:13:59.083 --> 00:14:01.250 You said he was going to be all right. 00:14:11.333 --> 00:14:17.000 Erm... It seems the knife entered the body and went upwards, 00:14:17.041 --> 00:14:19.875 er... making a small hole in the heart. 00:14:20.500 --> 00:14:25.125 Erm... At first the bleeding was contained, didn't even show up on the ultrasound. 00:14:25.625 --> 00:14:30.083 Erm... But then it got much worse very quickly. 00:14:31.208 --> 00:14:33.750 When we opened the body, opened the chest... 00:14:34.875 --> 00:14:37.625 it was impossible to control the size of the hole. 00:14:39.583 --> 00:14:41.625 I don't know what any of that means. 00:14:43.250 --> 00:14:45.250 We did everything that we could. 00:14:46.166 --> 00:14:50.250 You went for a scan, you said it was... reassuring. 00:14:50.833 --> 00:14:53.333 - Mr Bowker... - Are you telling us the truth? 00:14:53.375 --> 00:14:54.541 - Dan... - No, no. 00:14:54.625 --> 00:14:58.750 Because... you don't look to me... 00:14:58.791 --> 00:15:01.750 like someone... who is telling the truth. 00:15:03.291 --> 00:15:05.708 Staring at me, what you're doing with your hands. 00:15:06.458 --> 00:15:08.458 Did you make a mistake? 00:15:11.541 --> 00:15:14.250 When a knife goes into the body like that, 00:15:14.291 --> 00:15:16.875 there are all sorts of possibilities for damage. 00:15:17.625 --> 00:15:20.625 The arteries, the heart, the lungs. 00:15:20.666 --> 00:15:22.541 We try to be comprehensive. 00:15:22.625 --> 00:15:24.875 We would like to know what we need to repair. 00:15:24.916 --> 00:15:28.958 But there's always a chance, as with Alex, 00:15:29.000 --> 00:15:31.625 that there's something we can't see. 00:15:32.208 --> 00:15:36.083 - So you missed it? - There was no way of knowing. 00:15:38.666 --> 00:15:40.666 What's your name? 00:15:41.458 --> 00:15:42.625 Mr Allerton. 00:15:43.250 --> 00:15:45.250 Your first name. 00:15:45.833 --> 00:15:47.625 Jon. 00:15:48.125 --> 00:15:52.625 Jon, can you honestly say... 00:15:53.416 --> 00:15:56.208 that you did everything you could... 00:15:57.208 --> 00:15:59.958 to save our son? 00:16:03.625 --> 00:16:05.625 Yes. 00:17:00.250 --> 00:17:02.250 Is... is he OK? 00:17:03.541 --> 00:17:05.500 God! 00:17:07.958 --> 00:17:09.958 Come on, come on. 00:17:31.958 --> 00:17:33.958 Are you all right? 00:17:38.875 --> 00:17:40.875 A 15yearold boy died. 00:20:06.083 --> 00:20:08.041 Hi, Kate. Pleasure to meet you. 00:20:08.083 --> 00:20:09.416 Hi, Jon! You too. 00:20:10.291 --> 00:20:11.541 - You should be in bed. - Er... Are you making tea? 00:20:15.875 --> 00:20:17.875 That's his room there. 00:20:28.458 --> 00:20:30.625 I promise we'll be very careful with everything. 00:21:18.500 --> 00:21:21.791 - Hi. - Hi, er... Mr er... 00:21:22.625 --> 00:21:24.250 Daniel Bowker. 00:21:24.833 --> 00:21:26.750 - My son was Alex. - Yes. 00:21:26.791 --> 00:21:28.791 Yes, of course. How are you? 00:21:29.166 --> 00:21:30.833 I wondered, could we talk? 00:21:30.875 --> 00:21:32.875 Er... Have you called ahead? 00:21:33.750 --> 00:21:36.458 Well, no, you said that if I needed to speak more... 00:21:36.500 --> 00:21:38.833 It would have been better if you'd made an appointment. 00:21:38.875 --> 00:21:40.333 You can understand how busy we are. 00:21:40.375 --> 00:21:44.291 Well, I haven't got much time off, so... if you have a moment now? 00:21:48.166 --> 00:21:50.333 Give me five minutes. I'll be right back. 00:21:51.125 --> 00:21:53.625 - That's what you said on the night. - I'm sorry? 00:21:53.708 --> 00:21:55.500 "Five minutes". 00:21:55.583 --> 00:21:58.708 I told my wife. I said, "He'll be back, he'll tell us what's going on." 00:21:59.208 --> 00:22:00.625 You never did. 00:22:02.166 --> 00:22:04.166 If you'd like to wait here. 00:22:12.583 --> 00:22:14.958 - He's been through a lot. - So's everyone. 00:22:15.000 --> 00:22:17.833 Everyone wants to sit in a room and go through it second by second, 00:22:17.875 --> 00:22:20.375 but we can't drop everything just because... 00:22:21.875 --> 00:22:24.875 What is it? Is there something about him? 00:22:25.166 --> 00:22:27.583 No. What? 00:22:27.958 --> 00:22:31.708 - You didn't do anything wrong. - Hah. I know. 00:22:37.833 --> 00:22:40.916 Do you have any specific questions about what happened here? 00:22:41.250 --> 00:22:43.416 - Just one. - Sure. 00:22:44.166 --> 00:22:46.583 Did you make a mistake? 00:22:47.000 --> 00:22:50.500 - I don't believe so. - Because you... you seemed so calm. 00:22:50.833 --> 00:22:53.208 When I first saw you. 00:22:53.250 --> 00:22:57.791 - You reassured me. - At that point Alex was stable. 00:22:57.791 --> 00:23:00.041 It's important that we remain calm. 00:23:00.083 --> 00:23:05.208 The methodology is precise in trauma. We can't afford for there to be too much emotion. 00:23:05.250 --> 00:23:09.125 But when you were working on him, just before he died, you didn't seem calm. 00:23:09.166 --> 00:23:10.583 - You looked... - I was working. 00:23:10.625 --> 00:23:11.791 Guilty. 00:23:12.125 --> 00:23:14.708 - I was trying everything I could. - You were panicking. 00:23:15.250 --> 00:23:17.666 I saw you look down, then look up. 00:23:17.750 --> 00:23:19.791 In your eyes. I could tell. 00:23:19.833 --> 00:23:23.708 And then, later, when you explained to us that he was... dead... 00:23:25.708 --> 00:23:27.583 and what had happened, 00:23:27.666 --> 00:23:30.708 you were talking very quickly, much quicker than you're talking now. 00:23:30.750 --> 00:23:33.291 You seemed like you were... covering something. 00:23:33.333 --> 00:23:36.625 - Well, I promise... - Do you actively seek out dangerous situations? 00:23:36.708 --> 00:23:39.750 - Is that why you're doing this job? - Absolutely not. 00:23:39.791 --> 00:23:42.833 And in your life? Your spare time. 00:23:44.000 --> 00:23:48.208 You like... to do dangerous things? 00:23:48.916 --> 00:23:50.208 I don't think so. 00:23:51.041 --> 00:23:53.708 Climbing. It's on your page. It's on the website. 00:23:55.500 --> 00:23:57.875 - Mr Bowker... - Dan. My name's Dan. 00:23:58.541 --> 00:24:02.458 Dan. I promise, there wasn't a mistake. 00:24:04.750 --> 00:24:09.750 It was just part of the... injuries caused by the stabbing. 00:24:09.791 --> 00:24:12.333 The bleeding was too severe. 00:24:12.375 --> 00:24:16.000 - It wasn't when he came in. - It was. We just couldn't see it. 00:24:17.375 --> 00:24:21.791 So if, if you'd have noticed that hole earlier, 00:24:21.833 --> 00:24:23.291 you could have helped him? 00:24:23.333 --> 00:24:26.250 If we'd known about it we would have dealt with it immediately, yes. 00:24:26.291 --> 00:24:28.208 - So it was a mistake? - No, no. 00:24:28.250 --> 00:24:32.583 Just an example that... you can't see everything going on in a body. 00:24:32.666 --> 00:24:34.791 So why were you panicking like that? 00:24:34.833 --> 00:24:37.000 I could see it in your face. 00:24:39.125 --> 00:24:41.416 I think you misread the room. 00:24:50.250 --> 00:24:52.416 - I'm upset... - I'm sure. 00:24:52.458 --> 00:24:55.125 Mad. Not in my right mind. 00:24:55.166 --> 00:24:58.708 - That's not what I'm saying. - Do you have children? 00:24:58.750 --> 00:25:00.750 - Yes. - One. 00:25:01.375 --> 00:25:04.375 I... One, yes. How did you know? 00:25:04.416 --> 00:25:07.666 Just a guess. You're busy. Busy people often just have one child. 00:25:09.750 --> 00:25:14.333 Dan... Why don't you say whatever it is you want to say? 00:25:20.750 --> 00:25:22.708 I wake up thinking about him. 00:25:22.750 --> 00:25:26.083 That room. What I saw. 00:25:26.125 --> 00:25:28.166 The moment that Alex died. 00:25:30.666 --> 00:25:32.666 When I wasn't there. 00:25:34.916 --> 00:25:37.166 Do you wake up thinking about it? 00:25:37.208 --> 00:25:40.041 Alex. That moment. 00:25:41.791 --> 00:25:46.333 If you couldn't deal with death in this job, you wouldn't be working here. 00:25:46.375 --> 00:25:49.708 - So you don't think about it? - I... I think about it. 00:25:49.750 --> 00:25:51.375 But you don't lose sleep? 00:25:53.041 --> 00:25:54.958 No. 00:26:02.250 --> 00:26:04.083 How long have you been doing this job? 00:26:05.291 --> 00:26:09.041 Erm... I've been a surgeon 20 years nearly. 00:26:09.958 --> 00:26:12.125 - And you're how old? - 46. 00:26:13.166 --> 00:26:14.333 You look older. 00:26:14.958 --> 00:26:17.208 No, sorry. 00:26:17.250 --> 00:26:20.125 Actually, I'm, er... 47 now. 00:26:21.125 --> 00:26:23.083 - Recent birthday? - Last week. 00:26:23.125 --> 00:26:26.291 - You had a party? - A family thing. 00:26:27.708 --> 00:26:29.250 Cake? Few drinks? 00:26:29.291 --> 00:26:33.833 Er, yeah. A nice dinner with the family and a few friends. 00:26:44.625 --> 00:26:46.041 It's his funeral. 00:26:46.083 --> 00:26:48.250 Next week. 00:26:48.833 --> 00:26:50.833 Thursday. If you want to come? 00:26:53.416 --> 00:26:56.375 Erm... thank you, but er... 00:26:56.416 --> 00:26:58.833 we don't normally attend funerals. It's because... 00:26:58.875 --> 00:27:04.041 Well, on the website there's testimonies from former patients' families. 00:27:04.083 --> 00:27:07.958 - OK, yes... - They talk about the continued support. 00:27:08.000 --> 00:27:10.500 The relationship you develop over time. 00:27:10.583 --> 00:27:14.125 Occasionally. If the patient has been under our care for a long time, 00:27:14.166 --> 00:27:15.791 then, well, yes, 00:27:15.833 --> 00:27:19.000 - the family do become... - But you don't know us well enough? 00:27:20.416 --> 00:27:21.666 No. 00:27:35.083 --> 00:27:38.416 I feel like you're an important part of his life. 00:27:38.458 --> 00:27:41.416 You were there at the end. I wasn't there. 00:27:41.458 --> 00:27:44.458 - My wife wasn't there. - Dan, would you like to see someone? 00:27:44.500 --> 00:27:47.750 - I'm sorry? - There are a number of charities that, er... 00:27:47.791 --> 00:27:51.166 can provide support for relatives at a time like this. 00:27:52.166 --> 00:27:55.625 If you want to come to the funeral, you're welcome. 00:27:57.833 --> 00:27:59.833 Thank you. 00:28:21.125 --> 00:28:23.125 Mate... 00:28:24.958 --> 00:28:27.083 How are you doing? 00:28:27.125 --> 00:28:30.250 Yeah, you know. Good to be back at work. 00:28:31.458 --> 00:28:35.458 - Yeah, I thought you'd be off longer. - Well, good to be busy. 00:28:36.125 --> 00:28:38.291 Yeah. Yeah, of course. 00:28:39.125 --> 00:28:41.250 But for how long? 00:28:41.291 --> 00:28:43.458 What? 00:28:43.500 --> 00:28:47.833 I missed the meeting. The big staff meeting they had about it. 00:28:48.916 --> 00:28:52.583 But from what I understand, nothing was said, no complaints were made. 00:28:52.666 --> 00:28:55.750 No union action, just a load of us were dumped. 00:28:58.041 --> 00:29:02.500 And what happened to Alex is not going to make any difference, is it? The decision still stands. 00:29:02.541 --> 00:29:05.541 - They're not actually firing you. - Redundancy. 00:29:06.875 --> 00:29:08.625 You'll get a good reference. 00:29:08.708 --> 00:29:13.333 I've got two other kids and a wife that works in Asda. 00:29:14.041 --> 00:29:15.791 And a funeral to pay for now. 00:29:15.833 --> 00:29:17.791 I certainly wasn't insured for that, 00:29:17.833 --> 00:29:20.875 and I'll be * if he's going out in a cardboard coffin. 00:29:22.791 --> 00:29:25.375 - The lads have had a whipround. - I know. 00:29:25.416 --> 00:29:27.791 Wanted to help out. 00:29:27.833 --> 00:29:29.583 - Wasn't much. - What? 00:29:29.666 --> 00:29:31.541 I'm not being funny but it was 30 quid. 00:29:35.375 --> 00:29:38.833 Number of lads, they've known me for ages. Years, most of them. 00:29:39.541 --> 00:29:43.125 So I'd say 30 quid is a bit disappointing. 00:29:43.166 --> 00:29:45.250 What do you think? 00:29:45.291 --> 00:29:47.458 It's tough for everyone at the moment. 00:29:47.500 --> 00:29:49.916 How long have I got before I'm let go? 00:29:49.958 --> 00:29:53.041 End of the month. But, with what's happened, 00:29:53.083 --> 00:29:56.083 if you just want to go now, they'll pay you anyway. 00:30:02.250 --> 00:30:05.583 If I was born in a different place... 00:30:07.333 --> 00:30:09.916 if my mum and dad had more money... 00:30:11.333 --> 00:30:13.791 I'd be a completely different person? 00:30:16.250 --> 00:30:20.208 If my dad had money, he would have sent me to a better school. 00:30:20.750 --> 00:30:24.041 I would have done A levels, maybe even university. 00:30:24.083 --> 00:30:26.875 Things would have been better, made things better for myself. 00:30:26.916 --> 00:30:31.208 I would have put my son through private school, and now maybe he wouldn't be dead. 00:30:31.250 --> 00:30:35.583 Because that what's going through my mind pretty much all the time right now. 00:30:36.875 --> 00:30:40.666 That really he... he died because of me, because I'm a failure. 00:30:40.750 --> 00:30:44.333 - No, Dan. - I just wasn't born to the right people. 00:30:47.125 --> 00:30:49.125 And neither was my son. 00:30:58.500 --> 00:30:59.875 I'll leave now then. 00:31:22.000 --> 00:31:25.458 - Afternoon. - Afternoon. 00:31:27.708 --> 00:31:30.583 What do people make of you two at school? 00:31:30.625 --> 00:31:33.875 - What? - Well, you know... going out with a girl. 00:31:33.916 --> 00:31:35.958 Well, it's normal. So... 00:31:36.000 --> 00:31:37.291 Yeah. Good. OK. 00:31:37.375 --> 00:31:40.125 Yeah, more importantly, can we get back to preparation, please? 00:31:40.166 --> 00:31:42.041 The interview is three weeks away. 00:31:42.083 --> 00:31:44.375 And this is my future we're talking about. 00:31:44.458 --> 00:31:45.666 Dad? 00:31:46.208 --> 00:31:47.208 Sorry! 00:31:48.833 --> 00:31:51.041 - I'm proud of you, you know that? - Yeah? 00:31:54.416 --> 00:31:57.916 So, tell me... Alana, 00:31:57.958 --> 00:31:59.791 why do you wish to become a doctor? 00:31:59.833 --> 00:32:01.000 To shut my dad up. 00:32:02.041 --> 00:32:03.666 Sounds like a very good reason to me. 00:32:03.708 --> 00:32:06.458 Nah, it's important to me that my chosen profession 00:32:06.500 --> 00:32:09.000 helps people in a tangible way. 00:32:09.041 --> 00:32:11.583 I feel also that I am organised, 00:32:11.625 --> 00:32:13.166 precise, quick to learn, 00:32:13.208 --> 00:32:15.291 but with good people skills. 00:32:15.375 --> 00:32:18.666 I come from a medical family background. This... 00:32:18.708 --> 00:32:20.416 Dad? 00:32:25.833 --> 00:32:27.250 Dad, are you OK? 00:32:27.333 --> 00:32:30.125 Er, yeah. Yeah. I just, er... 00:32:32.833 --> 00:32:36.958 Yeah, I, er... just thought I saw someone... 00:32:38.500 --> 00:32:40.500 someone I knew. 00:32:44.625 --> 00:32:46.291 You work too hard. 00:33:07.208 --> 00:33:09.958 Are you all right? 00:33:10.000 --> 00:33:12.958 - Yeah. Yeah. - I can't do this. 00:33:17.875 --> 00:33:19.750 - Who's that? - The surgeon. 00:33:19.791 --> 00:33:22.125 What is he doing here? 00:33:35.708 --> 00:33:37.166 I didn't think you'd come. 00:33:38.041 --> 00:33:42.375 Well, maybe I owe it to Alex. Like you said, it's important. 00:33:45.666 --> 00:33:47.333 Do you want to say a few words? 00:33:50.458 --> 00:33:52.333 I... I don't think that I... 00:33:52.416 --> 00:33:54.708 It was a joke. 00:33:54.750 --> 00:33:56.208 Right. 00:33:57.250 --> 00:33:59.750 Good suit. 00:33:59.791 --> 00:34:02.000 Thank you. 00:34:02.583 --> 00:34:04.583 Best suit here. 00:34:05.666 --> 00:34:07.708 Dan, we're going in. 00:34:36.125 --> 00:34:39.416 The difficult thing about this is... 00:34:40.500 --> 00:34:43.208 that Alex always talked about the future... 00:34:46.083 --> 00:34:48.291 ever since he was a little boy. 00:34:50.375 --> 00:34:52.416 When he learnt to ride a bike... 00:34:53.791 --> 00:34:58.458 suddenly he wanted to become a motorbike racer. 00:35:00.041 --> 00:35:04.625 He went to the sea, he'd become a marine biologist. 00:35:06.458 --> 00:35:09.500 The most recent thing was that he was... 00:35:10.583 --> 00:35:12.791 he was going to be a music journalist. 00:35:14.750 --> 00:35:15.916 Yeah. 00:35:17.458 --> 00:35:18.833 Well... 00:35:20.958 --> 00:35:23.375 Alex isn't going to become anything. 00:35:25.208 --> 00:35:29.958 And... I don't believe in God. 00:35:31.583 --> 00:35:33.583 The afterlife. 00:35:35.375 --> 00:35:36.750 I think he's just... 00:35:40.375 --> 00:35:42.375 stopped. 00:35:44.291 --> 00:35:46.291 And he didn't have to. 00:35:48.375 --> 00:35:50.000 And at the moment... 00:35:52.000 --> 00:35:54.833 I'm... I'm just looking for someone to blame. 00:35:57.541 --> 00:36:00.750 I'm sure that's the wrong reaction. 00:36:02.791 --> 00:36:05.166 But I'm angry and I'm looking for that person to blame 00:36:05.250 --> 00:36:09.833 because that's how I think Alex would feel. 00:36:09.875 --> 00:36:11.875 AA... A real... 00:36:14.541 --> 00:36:16.208 injustice... 00:36:17.500 --> 00:36:21.000 that he wasn't able to do all the things that he wanted to do. 00:36:22.625 --> 00:36:25.083 He could have been anything that he'd set his mind to. 00:36:25.125 --> 00:36:27.125 He could have been anything. 00:36:28.791 --> 00:36:31.916 So what today is really about is... 00:36:33.000 --> 00:36:34.291 waste. 00:36:36.250 --> 00:36:38.708 I think it didn't have to happen. 00:36:38.958 --> 00:36:41.291 I think he'd still be with us now if... 00:36:44.875 --> 00:36:46.458 if the world hadn't failed him. 00:36:46.500 --> 00:36:47.625 If we... if we... 00:36:47.666 --> 00:36:50.000 if we'd somehow just... 00:36:50.041 --> 00:36:51.916 I don't know... 00:36:57.625 --> 00:36:59.625 looked after him better. 00:37:26.666 --> 00:37:29.375 Hi. Hi, Dan. Mrs Bowker. 00:37:30.708 --> 00:37:34.583 Erm... It was a... a beautiful service. 00:37:34.625 --> 00:37:37.166 Alex was clearly a wonderful young man. 00:37:38.958 --> 00:37:42.250 I have to go, but I just wanted to say, once again, how sorry I am. 00:37:42.333 --> 00:37:43.708 For what? 00:37:43.750 --> 00:37:47.708 Well, for your loss. That Alex died. 00:37:47.750 --> 00:37:51.500 Did you know what I meant when I said we all have to share responsibility? 00:37:51.541 --> 00:37:53.208 Dan... 00:37:53.291 --> 00:37:54.750 I'm not sure I entirely agree. 00:37:54.791 --> 00:37:58.083 I think responsibility lies firmly in the hands of whoever attacked him. 00:37:58.125 --> 00:38:01.208 - Do they know yet who it was? - They're still trying to find out. 00:38:01.291 --> 00:38:03.750 - Well, I do hope... - Can you listen to me? 00:38:03.791 --> 00:38:05.958 You have a responsibility too. 00:38:06.000 --> 00:38:09.666 - Dan. - Because he was in your care. 00:38:12.125 --> 00:38:13.750 Can I reassure you once again, Mr 00:38:13.750 --> 00:38:15.750 Bowker, that I did my absolute best. 00:38:15.791 --> 00:38:17.541 Your wife is a psychiatrist. 00:38:22.000 --> 00:38:25.083 - I'm sorry? - I looked you up. 00:38:26.375 --> 00:38:29.166 I have to go. Bye. 00:38:30.833 --> 00:38:35.500 You told me... you told me you'd been drinking the night you treated him. 00:38:35.541 --> 00:38:38.666 - What? - It was your birthday the night he died. 00:38:38.708 --> 00:38:41.083 And you told me that you'd had a few drinks. 00:38:41.125 --> 00:38:44.041 Now if you'd been drinking, you shouldn't have been at work. 00:38:45.083 --> 00:38:50.750 - I'm not sure I said that I... - You said "I had a few drinks for my birthday." 00:38:52.916 --> 00:38:56.791 - I don't think I said that. - Did you have a drink that evening? 00:38:56.833 --> 00:39:01.500 Because you told me that... when it was just the two of us together, 00:39:01.541 --> 00:39:03.916 you told me that you did. 00:39:04.583 --> 00:39:08.291 Now did you have a drink that night? 00:39:11.000 --> 00:39:12.750 No. 00:39:15.916 --> 00:39:18.833 Now I know that you're lying about all of it. 00:39:19.416 --> 00:39:22.000 Now that you've changed your story, 00:39:22.041 --> 00:39:26.791 I now know... that you made a mistake. 00:39:27.541 --> 00:39:29.500 And you know... 00:39:29.541 --> 00:39:32.500 in here... what you did. 00:39:33.416 --> 00:39:35.791 That you let him down. 00:39:36.375 --> 00:39:38.208 Admit it. 00:39:40.666 --> 00:39:42.125 Admit it! 00:39:43.583 --> 00:39:45.375 Hey. 00:39:45.416 --> 00:39:46.791 Dan. 00:39:48.916 --> 00:39:50.375 - Dan... - Aargh! 00:39:50.416 --> 00:39:53.000 Dan! What are you doing? 00:39:55.083 --> 00:39:57.083 - Dan? - Please. 00:40:00.875 --> 00:40:02.708 What is going on? 00:40:19.541 --> 00:40:22.458 - You're an idiot. - Yeah. 00:40:23.625 --> 00:40:24.375 Come on. 00:40:51.500 --> 00:40:52.833 Did you know him? 00:40:54.041 --> 00:40:57.375 - My son. - I'm so sorry. 00:40:59.208 --> 00:41:02.000 - This is where he died? - No, it isn't. 00:42:01.208 --> 00:42:03.583 Today is a great day! 00:42:03.625 --> 00:42:05.750 The birds are singing, the sun's shining. 00:42:05.791 --> 00:42:08.375 My beautiful daughter. Mwah! 00:42:09.250 --> 00:42:11.916 Both in their own ways on the brink of greatness. 00:42:11.958 --> 00:42:14.208 - I am a happy man. - There's no coffee. 00:42:14.250 --> 00:42:16.500 - What? - I finished it last night. 00:42:16.541 --> 00:42:18.833 Up till halfthree... apparently. 00:42:19.708 --> 00:42:22.750 - Revision? - Yeah. Revision. 00:42:25.958 --> 00:42:29.458 No coffee, no problem. I can get a coffee at work. 00:42:29.500 --> 00:42:32.250 - Why are you talking funny? - Because he's in a good mood. 00:42:32.291 --> 00:42:33.375 You are gorgeous! 00:42:33.375 --> 00:42:35.666 Did you sleep all right last night? It felt like you were awake. 00:42:35.750 --> 00:42:36.916 Really? 00:42:36.958 --> 00:42:38.541 No, I slept fine. 00:42:39.458 --> 00:42:42.458 You both... have a great day. 00:42:52.833 --> 00:42:54.000 - Morning. - Morning. 00:43:04.708 --> 00:43:05.875 Hello. 00:43:06.708 --> 00:43:09.958 Hi. I'm Dan. 00:43:11.166 --> 00:43:13.791 My son died a few weeks ago. You probably don't even... 00:43:13.875 --> 00:43:16.583 You're... you're working here? 00:43:16.625 --> 00:43:18.625 First day. 00:43:20.625 --> 00:43:22.375 Well, er... I'd better get on. 00:43:22.416 --> 00:43:23.625 Yeah.